...a DREAM in progess!

Expressive Souls - A New Adventure!

2010-08-27T08:53:00.000-07:00

Hello my friends.
I am feeling my way around a new adventure. It's very exciting. It's a bit scary.

This blog, IndigoMooneMusings was my first blog. My first attempt to share, to connect, to create out loud, in cyberspace ... and now, another form of expression is unfolding.

Ever since I entered into that deliciously complicated part of life called adolescence, I have wanted to paint. To be an artist. But I didn't allow it. Because I don't think I even knew it. And for most of my adult life I have convinced myself that ART is what other people do. People that went to art school. People that doodled on every available surface since they first picked up a crayon. People that dyed their hair bright bold colors. (Fascinating assumptions here...)

See, I didn't do those things. Because somewhere, for some insane reason, I didn't think I could. I thought for a very long time that I was only meant for practical things. Like bookkeeping. Because, you know, well, I was good at math and could balance my checkbook.

Over the past 10 years I have taken very tentative steps towards reclaiming creativity in my life. It started with belly dance. Of all places. And through that dance my steps have become very strong, even strides I'd say. And through dance, I gave myself permission to be creative. To create. To find beauty. To be bold. To risk. To lead.

As I allowed creativity to find expression in my life, I also let ART seep in, in tiny bits and pieces. Taking that first ever Art 101 class at the community college. Exploring water color. Making collages. Discovering the wonderful world of mixed media. And now, this year, trying ART journaling.

And now it's official, I have decided that ART will no longer just seep into my life. It is time to let it FLOOD in! To pour into and out of every ounce of my being. All I want to do is eat, sleep, and drink ART. No more waiting. Certainly no more thinking that ART is for other people.

I am an ARTist!

I have so much to express. My soul has a story to tell, a song to sing, beauty to create, and so much to share.

This blog, even the name, Indigo Moone, has been a huge part of this unfolding. A wild and creative name that took me out of Tracy, and into a whole new place in my life. But now I'm ready to be Tracy again. To integrate this wild and creative self into my life in every way, not keeping it separate from who I have been. And from who I am meant to be.

So won't you join me? In this new place, this place that has always been there, waiting until I was ready. And I am ready.

We are all Expressive Souls.
How does your soul express itself?

http://expressive-souls.blogspot.com

Share this new adventure with me!

Much gratitude and love for the journey!

tracy

A Dream Come True

2010-08-07T14:11:00.000-07:00

I did it!!!!

More than three years of dreaming of this, and I did it!

I participated in (and passed!) Paulette Rees-Denis' Collective Soul One belly dance intensive. Whew!

It was all I had hoped it would be, and more ~ learning from Paulette, connecting with other dancers, a chance to improve upon what I've been doing for the past 10 years, being inspired by a wonderful teacher, having fun, laughing, being challenged, visiting a new place (NW Oregon), and dancing, dancing, dancing!!!!

Paulette also has a new store in town with her husband Jeff, the Cultivator General Store, so I ate some fabulous food too!!!

I'm definitely overwhelmed by all of it, the traveling, the intense learning, being away from home ~ re-entry has been hard. But, am I glad I did it? Oh my gosh, YES!!!!

It feels like from here, new horizons are opening, new opportunities will appear, life is going to hold some big changes. I am so ready!

But for now, here are some photos of my awesome adventure!!!!

The Bike Inn/River Hideaway, where I stayed, Clatskanie, OR.

Self-portrait at the Cultivator General Store

The most adorable couple, Jeff and Paulette!

In front of the studio in Portland ~ Cayte, Sarah, Brandy & Kat ~ where we also had evening classes after dancing all day in Clatskanie!

We made it to the ocean, ahhh, beautiful!

The fabulous Paulette and her humble and elated Graduates!!!

An image found in Portland that says it all!

30 Journals 30 Days ~ An Interview

2010-07-27T09:13:00.000-07:00

Playing along today with the AMAZING Connie Hozvicka and her 30 Journals 30 Days Love. Everyday this month she has interviewed an Art Journaler, and now on the 31st day of July, she is featuring all the Lovelies that participate in her workshops, e-course, etc. Here's my interview, of ME! Thank you Connie!!!

•How long have you been Art Journaling?

I just started a couple months ago. I can't believe I didn't discover it sooner! I have loved collage projects for a very long time, and I've kept a written journal for years. But to find this place where all of that can be combined, adding in painting and drawing, where permission is granted to do ART everyday... it's just simply amazing.

•How has Art Journaling impacted, changed, or enhanced your life?

It has changed my life in every way imaginable. For just about all of my adult life I have believed that ART was for other people. For people who followed a certain path. Who were encouraged from a very young age. Who actually earn a living from it. And so I always hesitated to create. And now, here, through ART journaling, I have learned that ART is for everyone! Expressing ourselves though ART is exactly what it is about. It is not about product. It is not about pleasing someone else. It is all about process. About permission to make a mess, to try new things, to experiment, to find joy in the middle of all of it. To release pain. To tap into the very depths of our Soul. I now, finally, have found freedom, freedom to express my soul's desire. This is HUGE. It's MONUMENTAL!

•What are a few of your favorite Art Journaling materials?

I have fallen deeply in love with gel medium for texture. I also love acrylic paint, magazine pics for collaging, sparkly gel pens (LOVE sparkly gel pens), paint pens in general, textured paper, and I think I'm just discovering a love of stitching my pages!

•Who are some of your favorite Art Journalers?

I first came across and have been so inspired by the art journaling of Teesha Moore.

Sarah Whitmire has some lovely prompts she generously shares that I thoroughly enjoyed.

And now, the most wonderful Connie Hozvicka and her Art Journal Love Letters!

•What kind words of encouragement would you say to an Art Journal newbie?

I don't think it can be said enough ~ there is no wrong way to do ART journaling!! You can use whatever materials you want, whatever techniques you want, whatever paper you want. The idea is to express yourself, the good, the bad, the ugly. The beautiful, the inspired, the messy!! Give yourself permission to put color to paper. To glue. To scribble. Expresss yourself. It's all GOOD!!

•Where can we contact you...give us some link LOVE!!

My blog is here: Indigomoone Musings

I'm on Facebook: Tracy Carlton

I tweet here.

I have another life as a belly dancer here: Kundalini Belly Dance

And, big secret, a new slowly emerging not really ready, but sharing it here anyway adventure: Expressive Souls

•Short Bio

I am a dreamer, a dancer, an ARTist, a risk-taker. I am a recovering perfectionist and an emerging shaman. I am building up the courage and also a plan to take flight from a good but not-my-Soul's-Expression job into a life where dreams are real, creativity is queen, inspiration is generously given, connection is woven, and LOVE is shared.

So looking forward to sharing this journey with you!

Permission

2010-07-25T16:11:00.001-07:00

I have been bitten by the ART Journal addiction, or I have fallen madly in love with ART Journaling. Or, I have become OBSESSED with expressing myself through my ART Journal. Luckily, I am still taking time out to eat and sleep. I'd quit my job in an instant to ART Journal all day. Oh sure, I suppose there's a chance I'd get tired of it eventually. But it's a chance I'm willing to take.

So I haven't much been in the mood for writing. Which means this blog. My time has instead, been devoted to painting, collaging, drawing, getting messy, exploring, dreaming, processing, creating, and in general, spent in absolute BLISS!

And I joined another e-course, Art Journal Love Letters, with 4 weeks of ART Journal prompts, and a wonderfully loving community of fellow artists, and it ROCKS! Connie Hozvicka is truly amazing! Please go visit her at Dirty Footprints Studio.

In finding ART Journaling, I have found permission to be an Artist.

An ARTIST!

This is HUGE!

For the past, oh, 25 years or more, I put off creating any visual art because, well, I wasn't an ARTIST. You know, someone who doodled their way through grade school, went to art school, studied art history, wore black, and suffered. Because in my mind being an artist was about an identity. And of course, more importantly, it was about creating something OTHER people would like. Or admire. Or BUY. No bad art allowed. So I feared even starting.

Luckily I finally, in my late 30's, did start painting. And it was grand! But still, I would hear some friends, either artists themselves or related to artists, talk about REAL artists and REAL art. And well, no way was I one of those. I dabbled. I crafted.
It was a hobby.

All by OTHER people's definition.

And then came ART Journaling. And you know what I learned? It's not about what you create. It's about the PROCESS of creating. It is personal. It is playful. There is no WRONG way to do it.

How frickin' FREEING is that?

Finally, I have permission to create.

Sing hallelujah to that!!!

And you know what?

I AM an artist.

And here are a few of my creations:

Thank you for being here along on the journey with me.

Won't you create with me?

Summer Rituals

2010-07-17T19:23:00.000-07:00

It's summer. And it's HOT!

Our summer ritual, put on hold for a couple years while we tried to sell out house, is to sleep outside on our deck. We have some friends that would join us, mosquitos, so we use a screen tent to preserve our sanity and our skin.

We've also embraced eating outside. Creating outside. And of course playing outside!

I absolutely love this about summer!

What summer rituals do you have?

An Aha! Moment

2010-07-09T09:59:00.000-07:00

I am relatively new to ART journaling. I can't believe I haven't stumbled upon it before this year! I have kept a journal since the day I left college, have done expressive art collage projects for over 10 years, and have tentatively dabbled in ART, well, since I started coloring as a small wee child, but mostly in the past 5 years.

And now, finally, all of these parts of me have come together in the most delightful, soulful, meaningful sort of expression!

ART Journaling!!

Oh my!

Much of what I have read and learned about ART journaling, both online and in books, is that it is most definitely not about the end product. This is not about creating a piece of ART. No, ART journaling is all about process. It doesn't matter what materials you use, what medium, or what images. It can be crayons out of a box or a more elaborate set up of prepping the page, painting, collaging, gel medium transfers, etc. And all of this made complete sense to me. On an intellectual level, I completely bought into this concept.

Then, last night, I truly EXPERIENCED what those words mean. My son was asleep, my husband busy on the computer, and it was late, not really enough time to get into a project of any kind, so I thought I'd write in my journal. But truth be told, I wasn't really in the mood for that. So I grabbed my supply of markers (fat ones, skinny ones, sparkly ones, white ones) and started doodling. And I noticed that while I was doodling, putting pen to page, coloring really, that thoughts of the day were passing through my head. Things I had done, people I had met, and ultimately, judgments I had held against someone, and then against myself. I kept drawing and coloring and doodling. Then, when it seemed "done" I felt that some words were necessary.
And out they came, exactly what my soul needed to hear, from some deep down place, words I couldn't have written, wouldn't have written, if I was only writing in my journal.

So here is that picture. But really, here is that process. Here is the result of healing happening. Of sorting through my day, of witnessing, and then releasing what needed to be released. Followed with some kindness, and a reminder.

I get it now! I understand!
ART journaling!
I am in love with this new thing in my life.
So glad to have met you!

I Believe in Miracles

2010-07-05T13:11:00.000-07:00

I went up to my quiet sit spot this morning, where my altar is, with the intent of focusing on *Believing Anything Can Happen*. I tromped up the stairs with a hot cup of tea in one hand and my journal, The Artist's Way, and a pen in the other. As I settled myself in, I happened to notice one of the most amazing things I think I've ever seen. And right then and there. I just knew. ANYTHING is possible. I can DO ANYTHING I set my heart and mind to. Here's what I saw:

Do you see what this little Spider has done? That STONE, that is dangling from its web, used to be IN that bowl! How did that little critter MOVE that stone out of the bowl?
WOW!!

Here's a little bit closer look:

Now, truly, if that tiny but mighty Spider can move *mountains* well dammit so can I!
And the STRENGTH of that web! I too am stronger than I know.

ANYTHING really is possible.

Watch out world. Here I come!

Summer

2010-07-01T13:07:00.000-07:00

*8 Things: Simply Summer

Sometimes I play along, it depends on what my day looks like!

Happy to play today, because usually my summer doesn't usually look much different from the other seasons. I work all year. With occasional days off. Maybe now that Ian is starting school the concept of *summer vacation* will start entering our lives.

But I don't want to wait until NEXT summer to begin. So here are my *8 Things: Simply Summer.

Oh, one more thing, the first thing to go on my list, we've already done! I happen to have 8 more things though.

Done: Sleep on Deck (we'll be doing this all summer!)

1. Canoe Trips
2. Blackberries: picking, eating, & jam making
3. Braids & pigtails
4. Beach get-away weekend
5. Dining on the deck
6. Fudgsicles
7. Play in an outdoor fountain
8. Bake a fruit pie

So excited to make these happen this summer!

How will you celebrate Summer?

Breathe

2010-06-29T15:19:00.000-07:00

Here's me, getting all stressed by all the goodness I try to cram into my life.

There are just SO many things I want to experience, to try, to explore... and only so many hours in a day. I have to say to myself constantly, "Breathe, you are exactly where you are meant to be." And well, to be honest, I don't usually listen to myself either.

We had new friends, someone I had met through the Mondo Beyondo* e-course, visit us yesterday and today. They are on an awesome adventure, traveling from Ontario, Cananda, all through the US and across Canada. I have loved following their blog, Dandelion Express,* and I was so thrilled they made a stop in little ol' Pioneer, CA. And yet their stay was RUSHED. Because, well, I try to fit EVERYTHING in.

Some day I will learn.

I have a new picture on the wall behind my computer, it says "Turn Off the Computer: Make Art." * Notice I'm sitting here typing about it rather than doing what it says.

So, it seems I have several areas for improvement. But you know what? I'm letting go of that. I'm not going to hurry. I'm not going to worry. I'm right where I'm supposed to be.

Not that a Clearing* wouldn't be a bad idea. If I want to invite more in, I need to clear something out.

I'm observing myself. That's what this post is about. And I'm giving myself permission to be who I am. To love that crazy self who tries to do oh so much, I would rather love this part of me than berate myself for not being something, or someone else. I am who I am.

I am enough.*

Thanks to Tracey Clark* for that phrase.

And so it goes!

*there are no links to any of these references, well, because i AM going to get off the computer in a moment, feel free to goolge the *asteriks,* awesome folks!

Dreaming the Dream

2010-06-26T18:11:00.001-07:00

I am happiest when I am creating ART.

When I am creating ART time as a concept disappears. I am lost in the process. This little dab of paint here, this line there. I become present and in the now. It becomes a meditative state. It is so much more effective for me than trying to sit on a pillow and focus on my breathing. When I am drawing, painting, and collaging I enter into bliss. Not "la-la the world is perfect there are no problems kind of bliss," but rather a place of centeredness and a feeling that everything is all right, no matter what is happening. It's hard to put into words, this feeling, this experience.

But today was one of those blissful days. Nearly a half a day of losing myself in ART!

Tracy making ART = one happy girl!

These days I am learning new techniques in collage and mixed-media. I am also "practicing" the act of getting anything down on paper so I don't spend all day staring at a white canvas. I found the most wonderful Art Journal prompts here. Sarah Whitmire is so generous in sharing her inspiration and ideas with others through her blog. I have a very busy summer, otherwise I'd be signing up for her online classes in Soul Journaling.

This is the "journal prompt" I've been working on. All about Home and Family. And so here is what I created:

So much FUN!!

I am so grateful for the chance to create!

What do you do to find your place of Bliss?

Happy Creating!

Letting Go

2010-06-22T08:26:00.000-07:00

Sometimes life gets overwhelming. It throws us more than we can or want to handle. The answers seem far away. And all the EFFORT in the world doesn't seem to solve a problem.

At times like these, I feel it's best to let go. Hand it over to *God*.

What I do is write down whatever it is that's bothering me ~ feeling hopeless about a life dream, frustrated with someone, having a bad day, or just wanting some help to get it all done.

And I put it here.

This is my *God Jar*.
(You may insert your word of choice here ~ Universe, Mother Earth, Great Mystery, Spirit. God Jar just had a nice ring to it. It flowed better than Universal Spirit Jar.)

By the way, no, *God* is not in the jar (as in take a peek and finally see what S/he looks like). But, rather, this is where Hope resides. Here is where I can release my problem. Here is where HELP awaits!

So I put my little piece of paper into this jar and say thanks and know that I'm not alone. That someone's got my back. That I can let go.

It's a tangible tool. A practicle form of prayer in a way. I need the physical ritual, the visual prop, to really feel like I'm letting go. I have discovered that this is the perfect way for me.

It's also amazing how it works. Solutions appear. Help is offered. Doors open.

You should try it.

Besides, creating the jar was the best part! So much fun.

What tools do you use? What rituals make up your life? Please share them, I'd love to know!

A special thanks to my friend Kristi for introducing this idea to me!

Surrender

2010-06-17T17:38:00.000-07:00

I have a hard time being sick. There are so many things that fill my life. I don't want to miss out on anything!

Yet that is exactly how I get sick. Trying to do everything.

My word for this year is Surrender. A word I chose with the intent that I will not plan, schedule and fill up my year with so many activities and goals. Instead I want this year to be one of going with the flow, following my intuition and seeing what comes along. A year of letting go in a way.

Half way into the year I'm busier than ever. And even though I didn't plan out the year in January, I've managed to fill it up quite easily as each month speeds by.

Apparently slowing down does not come naturally to me. And so my body takes over and helps me along.

I get sick.

And I am forced to slow down. To cancel plans. To stay home.

So I am reminded that my word for this year is Surrender: I hereby surrender to this awful cold. I hereby surrender to forces greater than me. I hereby surrender to a slower pace.

Willingly? Ha ha.

Okay, I'm learning.

I Surrender.

Transformation

2010-06-11T08:52:00.000-07:00

"Painting is to dream. When the dream is over, I don't remember anything I dreamed about. The painting, however, remains. It is the harvest of my dream."

Friedensreich Hundertwasser

Before and After

This is what I've been creating recently.
Transforming the cover of my new journal.

I started with a beautiful piece from Kelly Lish out of the March/April edition of Somerset Studio (thank you Kelly for such an inspirational start). Then I cut and tore, pasted and inked.
Getting lost in the process.

So much fun!

Now for the back!

Dare to Say It Out Loud

2010-06-08T08:35:00.000-07:00

An Interview with, Well, Me!

I follow a number of very inspiring blogs. They provide a network of amazing people doing amazing things! They also give me great food for thought on what I’d like to put onto my own blog.

Yesterday, over at Wish Studio, Mindy encouraged her readers to do an interview (THAT CARMEN TORBUS wrote!!! it took me a while to get back here and fix that!!!) of themselves. She has been asked to be interviewed herself and says, “The questions are hard to answer, but once out there for all to see, it’s amazingly liberating.”

So in the spirit of sharing what inspires me, and in taking the risk, putting myself out there, and in the spirit of Liberation… here goes!

*******

1. You’ve got some amazing things happening and I can’t wait to hear more about it! Can you tell us a little about yourself and the inspiration behind what you do?

I always seem to have many things happening in my life at any given moment! Here are the big ones right now:

I teach tribal style belly dance classes and am part of a performing troupe. I have a little studio on Main Street in a small town in the Sierra Nevada foothills in northern California. My hope is that this studio offers a place for women to take risks, to become bold, to have fun, and meet other women in search of adventure in their lives. As part of my on-going love of learning, I will be fulfilling a long held dream this summer, participating in a 3-day improvisational tribal style belly dance intensive. It is a style of dance that has always spoken to me. One based on cues and body language and nonverbal communication. Learning to dance within a set vocabulary of dance moves that let women come together, no matter what country they come from nor what language they speak, and dance together in perfect harmony. I am so excited to begin this journey, to eventually share this style of dance with others.

I am also planning my first ever as of yet unnamed soul retreat for my as of yet undiscovered soul tribe of sisters. It will take place early next year, on the coast in winter. It promises to be a chance for connection, art, spiritual exploration, lots of tea, and cozy fires.

I am also finally, after more than 40 years on this planet, embracing my inner ARTist and giving her a voice, a chance for expression, at last! Each day, no matter how small the amount of time, I create something. The medium is not important, it can be with my son’s chalk and a picture on the sidewalk. But giving myself this permission to create has been the best gift ever. It makes me happier, I feel better about myself, I see *ART* wherever I go, everything inspires me now! And my family sees the change as well. They like this new me too.

2. We’re dying to know, what inspires you more than anything else in the whole world?

So to choose one big something… Well, it seems odd, but right now it’s anything with stripes! Drawing them, coloring them, wearing striped socks and tights, seeking out striped shirts…there is something so fun and whimsical about stripes. I adore Dr. Seuss at the moment!

3. What is your big dream? Yes, the BIG one! The really, super big, pee your pants when make it happen dream. The one you feel a wee bit nervous saying out loud. Yep, that one!

The scary one to admit out loud? My BIG DREAM is to lead other women on journeys to sacred places on Earth, to create ART and magic at those places, to connect in a very deep, shamanic, celestial and fun way. It’s so hard not to downplay that dream, to dismiss it in some way as *new-agey* or *airy-fairy* and to worry about what others will think as I share it openly. But that’s truly it!

4. Tell us how you’re going to feel when you make it happen!

Connected. Connected to other women, to Earth herself, to the *hard to name thing* that is Spirit, God, the Universe, One with All. I will feel inspirited! And alive!

5. What would you do if you knew you couldn’t fail and fear didn’t exist?

I would quit my day job and start planning those dream retreats that I just wrote about above. Actually, what’s absolutely thrilling, is that JUST NOW, as I typed, I decided they should be called *D*R*E*A*M* Retreats.

6. What’s next for you?

Well, apparently, given the gist of this interview, it’s getting started on those retreats. Here goes!!!

7. What are you working on right now that you could use some support and encouragement on?

I have found that one of the biggest challenges I have ever faced in my life is being a mother. I second-guess myself over and over, that I’m doing enough for my son, that I must certainly lack a nurturing gene, that I’m not short-changing him in some way by having so many other interests that are not related directly to his needs. It is a constant area for growth, and also for daily practice of finding, and applying, compassion for myself.

8. What advice, tips, resources, and overall good-to-know information would you offer someone just starting out with regards to finding passion & inspiration and digging in?

One of the best places I would recommend going to is Mondo Beyondo. This e-course rocked me like no other! You won’t be disappointed. It encourages you to dream big, and all within a supportive network of other dreamers!

I am also part of a group of lovely women, who I met through Mondo Beyondo, and we are all reading/doing/being inspired by The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron. Another way I am embracing my inner artist.

9. Is there anything else you’d like to share?

I feel so fortunate, and excited, to be on this path, even though at times I feel like I’m in a holding pattern. I know fabulous life-changing events are brewing. I have taken the first few tentative steps, I have taken some risks, I believe that my life is about to be turned upside down!

10. Where can we find you online and what is the best way to connect with you?

I am online in two places, in the belly dance world at Kundalini Dance, and at my blog, ...a *D*R*E*A*M* in progess! You can also email me at indigomoone@yahoo.com or kundalinidance@yahoo.com.

The Real Deal

2010-06-07T18:52:00.000-07:00

There is something about wanting to live an authentic life that screams out for richness. I don’t mean *lots-of-money* richness, but rather a certain quality of life that I want to invite in. A *living out loud, now-not-later, fun and beautiful* kind of life. I feel very fortunate because one of these moments came into my life this past week.

My mother is in the process of cleaning out her garage and she has many, many boxes of her mother’s belongings. My brother and I went through some of them, discussing the variety of items we came across. In this day and age, how does one find a use for individual salt trays? Who are the people that still take the time to eat dessert out of parfait glasses? And why did Grandma have so many tea cups?

There were so many exquisite items in those boxes! But the only thing I came home with (so far) was her silverware. Actual silver! It’s a mismatched, hodge-podge set of teaspoons, knives, salad forks and the like, with more butter knives than I think I’ve ever seen in one place before! Heavy, solid, sparkly utensils, a word that doesn’t even really fit to describe what I found. I wish I could ask her about the stories behind each piece. Grandma, how did you end up with this one here, or what happened to the rest of this set there? What stories she could have shared.

When I got home, I realized it would be so easy to put these away all snug in their pouches for those *special* occasions. But then what’s the fun in that? Why put off life in that way? Why not celebrate every day? Why not honor our food, the ritual of breaking bread together, with such well-made craftsmanship at each and every meal?

So out went all our very simple, cheap, perfectly good stainless steel flatware (to a good cause mind you). And into our drawer went silver forks, spoons and knives that will remind me both of my Grandma, and also remind me to appreciate and honor each and every meal with my family.

And eating is just so much more elegant now!

This is one small step towards living my life to the fullest, celebrating each moment. I invite you to seek out and welcome these opportunities into your life too ~ doing it now, not someday.

What can you invite into your life that is authentic and full of richness? Share your story with me!

Tapping Into Something Greater

2010-06-01T11:24:00.000-07:00

I believe in ART.

ART ~ the process of creating, of diving into our creativity ~ the colors, the messiness, the beauty ~ it takes you outside of yourself, into a place where time is forgotten, schedules are meaningless, and nothing exists but the pure expression of self. I believe that when we let go of our critical voices, the noisy thoughts, the incessant *shoulds,* we tap into a magical place. A place where we know exactly who we are, and what we're doing here on this big beautiful and crazy planet, and that everything matters, and nothing does. Some call it intuition, others call it our sixth sense, or Divinity, God, Spirit...

It is powerful to experience, whatever it's name.

Two months ago, I created a cover for a new journal. A mixed media collage of images, words, paint, and ink. I chose for one corner of the cover this picture (can you see it?):

I wasn't sure why. I have two cats, this one doesn't resemble either of them. But I trusted that intuition, that space that I was in that told me, yes, this picture. So onto the page it went with no further thought, until...

Saturday I finished writing in that journal (it was a busy and inspiring two months of writing!). And as I gazed at that kitty, I was quite surprised.

Over a month ago my mother's neighbor passed away, leaving her cat behind, and he needed a good home. Being the cat-lover I am, I of course volunteered to take him in. It's been two weeks of figuring out the logistics, calming him down to make the journey to his new home, and bringing him here.

And of all mornings for him to arrive, and of all mornings for me to reach the end of that journal ~ because this is the kitty I brought home:

Rather close resemblance, no?

Wow!

Magical.

And meant to be.

This is why ART matters. The process of tapping into Something Greater. Where it all makes sense. Where we already know. It is the place of our deepest self. Trust that place!

How do you invite ART into your life?

8 Small Things ~ Gratitude

2010-05-18T12:57:00.000-07:00

I am inspired by so many fabulous blogs out there in the world.

For my blog post today, i got my inspiration from here, Magpie Girl ~

"When the sun comes out ... my heart gets grateful.

Little things become more easily seen and treasured."

In the spirit of being grateful, and honoring those things, both big and little, here are 8 from me:

1. Rain in the month of May in California

2. Food in my tummy

3. Happenings like Tribal Fest

4. Fresh local, organic strawberries

5. The robin on our deck as I type

6. Sisterhood

7. Ian's crazy imagination

8. Courage

For these things, Thank You!

Transformation & Rebirth

2010-05-12T12:47:00.000-07:00

CERRIDWEN
and the
Cauldron of Transformation

Cerridwen comes from Welsh legend.

She embodies all three lunar aspects of the Goddess, Maiden, Mother & Crone,

however she is primarily known in her Crone aspect.

Cerridwen's cauldron is an ancient feminine symbol of renewal, rebirth, transformation and inexhaustible plenty. It is the primary female symbol of the pre-Christian world, and represents the womb of the Great Goddess from which all things are born and reborn again. Like the Greek Goddess, Demeter, and the Egyptian Goddess, Isis, Cerridwen was the great Celtic Goddess of inspiration, intelligence and knowledge, and was invoked as a law-giver and sage dispenser of righteous wisdom, counsel and justice.

This painting was inspired by this idea of transformation and rebirth.

It was also COMPLETELY inspired by the projects in the book Taking Flight by Kelly Rae Roberts.

I thank her immensely for encouraging me to play with paint!

Honoring the endings and the beginnings that are the spiral of our lives...

...here's to TRANSFORMATION!

Stretch out those wings, and fly!

2010-05-04T13:10:00.001-07:00

I am thrilled and honored to be reading/doing/committing to the Artist's Way by Julia Cameron with a wonderful group of women!

And I'm off with a running start...

It's my second time ~ very excited about it!

Wish me luck!

Here's to a community of ARTists ... a WORLD of ARTists!

A Little of Tracy Today

2010-04-18T20:00:00.000-07:00

Idea for this blog copied from The Great Askini. Thank you Holli!

Outside my window… all is quiet at dusk, the sky still holds a trace amount of blue, a beautiful Spring day.

I am thinking… that I need to create ART everyday, somehow.

I am thankful for… oh so much… this day, my love, my son, this home, belly dance, ART, this path...

From the kitchen… a wonderful meal prepared by my love, and now a stack of dishes awaiting my visit.

I am wearing… orange and black.

I am creating… my Life, exactly the way it should be.

I am going… to Tribal Fest in a few weeks!! Dancing, shopping, ogling dancers and their lovely, wild, inspired, and creative costumes and their delicious, infectious, inspirited Dance!

I am (re)reading… Tribal Vision, by Paulette Rees-Denis. Sigh, she is awesome.

I am hoping… that Big Changes do indeed happen this month, or at least their beginnings.

I am hearing… my son and my husband playing together, the fridge humming, a few birds still calling to each other as the day ends.

Around the house… spring cleaning actually happened today: some windows got washed, some vacuuming occurred, candles and candle holders cleaned up, a shower curtain scrubbed (WAY overdue).

One of my favorite things… is collaging. I have just *discovered* Art-Journaling, what took me so long?

A few plans for this week… dreaming big, having faith, slowing down, finding courage, surrendering, dancing, creating.

Blessings for the week!

From Dream to Reality...

2010-04-07T15:07:00.000-07:00

Waiting for the Wind

Here are some words that touched me today, from Gypsy Girl's Guide:

"...when things are brewing and cooking inside, it feels like nothing is happening... It feels like we'll never be able to go from dream to reality. When those dreams are big like becoming a mother, finding our life's work, meeting the right partner, buying a house, creating a family and launching a new business, etc, it seems even harder and more distant. But the beauty of the process is that if we are pregnant with a dream or idea, just like a baby, sooner or later, it has to be born! I find so much peace in that thought. And that is what I am holding onto right now. Everything that needs to be born, will be born in its own time. We can give our love to the process, but we can't rush it."

Dreaming BIG and Sharing It

2010-04-07T11:32:00.000-07:00

I have mentioned Mondo Beyondo in earlier posts, if this is this first time to hear about it, check them out, you won’t be sorry!

This is my Mondo Beyondo Dream List. All the things I want out of life, but have been too afraid to ask for, or have hesitated asking for, or have been too afraid to share with others. This is me dreaming BIG! This is me creating the space for Magic to happen. This is me putting it out there for others to read. Scary! But all very good! Here I go!

-Africa. Get thee-self back there somehow, someday, someway for connection, celebration, dance, spirit!
-THRIVING (as opposed to Comfortable) in my own skin ~ able to feel comfortable in front of 5 or 500 or 5,000 people!
-Find and be part of a circle of Sisters ~ an artistic, shamanic, intergalactic Sisterhood!
-Go to Thailand and Japan again, this time with my family
-Be a Leader and Inspire others through my Art
-Have a Cob/Strawbale or otherwise Natural-Materials-Built Art Studio in a beautiful place
-Be part of and rooted in an Intentional Community quite like Damanhur, www.damanhur.org
-Travel to Sacred Sites all over the world, being part of, wait, LEADING Sacred Art experiences at these sites
-Fabulous, juicy, soulful sex life!
-A COMPLETE release of EVER having to Worry about how ANY of this will be paid for ever again
-Connect in some way, because I feel like I am meant to, with a groovy group of women I know only through Blogs at this moment
-Turiya
-To get everything I need/desire from fellow artists on ETSY {or any other groovy place like that}
-Freedom to create my own schedule at all times
-Take my son all over this beautiful planet sharing other cultures and ways of being with him first-hand
-Participate in Art Retreats
-Visit, participate in and collaborate with the folks at Damanhur
-A Home by the Ocean ~ {even bigger} ~ in Africa
-Someone to clean my house
-To be so Centered that all of my insecurities and jealousies are released!
-Paint REALLY BIG in public places in sacred ways for sacred ceremonies
-A Clawfoot Bathtub in a gorgeous natural setting under the stars

It seems so short in hind-sight. So…

The rest of this list was “borrowed” (and slightly reworked and personalized) from other stupendous dreamers in the Mondo Beyondo community, but I feel each one so strongly, that I decided to add them to my list too. There’s lots of repeats, but that’s just because they must be important! It makes the list INCREDIBLY long, but here it is, in cyberspace and out into the Universe! Go!

-Be the wild, silly and playful woman I have never allowed myself to be
-Get Ian FANTASTIC amazing learning opportunities that lights him up
-More adventure
-Be unpredictable and unafraid
-Wander intuitively
-Open a business that doesn’t require a lot of effort to manage
-Open consciousness in Amador
-Have lots of time for myself to do things that feed my soul and serve the community/planet
-Live near to all the people I care most about and we support each other in realizing our dreams
-Someone gives us a house someplace beautiful
-Have a LOT OF FUN! I describe my life as FUN!
-Ride in a hot air balloon
-Continue to foster my tribe and find more of my tribe
-Create a life without a morning scramble
-Make a million dollars by making people smile
-Sell many paintings
-Get paid to paint what I want
-Live healthy
-Make a difference in people's lives
-Do something adventurous every day
-Find a community of people who inspire me
-Have a loving, brave marriage with my husband
-Live in a house on the beach
-Make yoga a more integral part of my life
-Live honestly and authentically
-Forgive
-Never work at a job again where I am not working for myself
-Take yearly trips with girl friends
-Speak another language totally fluently
-Be featured in a magazine
-Collaborate with people that I admire and become friends
-Teach & inspire others (including my own son) to grow up healthy & happy and to know what really matters in life
-Design a house from scratch and have someone build it
-Raise a super happy kid
-Laugh
-A blessed life
-Joy
-Care for myself
-Be sexy dammit!
-Love the whole me
-Have a creative circle of friends
-Participate in a flash mob
-Say "Why not?" more often
-Go to New York City to visit
-Organize flash mobs, get onlookers to participate in flash mobs
-Be comfortable in social gatherings/meeting new people
-Work from home
-Be confident
-Be self-aware
-Deepen my relationship with my husband
-Road schooling Ian
-Eat only organically, and locally, or fair trade food
-Get to and stay at a healthy weight
-Wear a bikini and love myself in it
-Speak my mind
-Be an artist for a living
-Zip line somewhere awe-inspiring
-Be more spontaneous & adventurous with everyday plans
-Make art
-Pay it forward
-Have more fun and play more
-A house with space for guests, coffee weekends, girlfriend retreats, and entertaining
-Spend more time in nature
-Ride horses
-Be more daring
-Do yoga/meditate daily
-Be more creative
-Produce amazing art
-Have a huge studio where I can make art freely without having to move things or not spill on the carpet
-Receive lots of money to make art and travel
-Be at ease
-Have heart to heart talk more often with anyone
-Massages! Yes, one every week, and amazing ones too!
-Love with my whole heart
-Trust more
-Trust in myself completely
-Help people make small changes to live a more meaningful life
-Come towards everything from a place of curiosity and YES
-Eat at Chez Panisse
-Order a case of good wine on a regular basis
-Firewalk
-See the Northern Lights
-Do art
-Feel fabulous in anything, and nothing
-Play hooky frequently
-Have chickens
-My home is my sanctuary
-Be an excellent leader
-Be recognized for something amazing that I do
-Enjoy a loving, passionate, sexy relationship with my partner and we will grow old together
-Be an artist
-Draw, paint, create and sell my work
-Play with paint on canvas
-Connect with my African journey
-Be known for my creativity
-Do beautiful things
-Have a window overlooking a gorgeous view, where I will work and play
-Eat healthy foods and take care of myself
-Still my inner critic
-Loosen up and dress as myself
-Go to an African concert in Africa
-Learn to laugh uproariously
-Learn to let go and zaghareet
-Have a light filled studio rich in color, ethnic fabrics, velvets, flowers, beautiful music and a comfy couch and a nice big workspace
-Take my art to market
-Keep discovering my soft inner heart and learn to revel in it ever more deeply
-Learn to dress in a way that feels lighthearted, colorful and more expressive
-Cut my inner critic off at the knees
-Refuse to do ANYTHING that doesn't ADD to my life
-Find my tribe and keep them close
-Have closer female friends
-Know what to say
-Have a wardrobe that makes me feel confident
-Go on an annual woman's retreat with my 'tribe'
-Be happy for others
-Make a difference
-Be part of an art exhibition and have my work on display
-Be spontaneous
-Be wise
-Be present
-Find my divinity within me & ALWAYS keep her ALIVE
-Be an artist
-Publish my own book
-Be an active, involved, fun, caring, and nurturing mother that my son wants to be with and talk with
-Have my art displayed in an art gallery
-Sell my art online and in an art gallery
-Swim with the dolphins
-Be silly more often and lighthearted
-Be in a passionate marriage now and when I’m 50, 60, 70, and beyond
-Be a part of a supportive, nurturing community of creative friends
-Be able to find and wear comfortable and beautiful clothing in luscious colors and patterns that allow me to feel like the creative person I am on the inside
-Paint wonderful paintings and sell them
-Raise a caring, strong and self-confident son
-Raise a loving son who respects women
-Attend a summer art retreat, annually
-Do art installations
-A tree house for my son
-Have my ART make the cover of a magazine
-Visit my book in the bookstore and see it as a bestseller
-Write and publish a book about creativity
-Inspire others through my ART, my paintings
-Offer retreats/a space for women who desperately need permission to be creative, create a place that will nurture and inspire them
-Have my ART published and licensed through an amazing ecological company
-Make art in all the places I live
-Have a wild artistic garden and house
-Host a wkly/monthly soup night, invite all my friends, neighbors, have my home be a comfortable gathering spot
-Have a playful and plentiful sex life
-Have a flourishing garden w/ veggies, fruit, sculptures and surprises
-Learn how to appreciate wine
-Drink GOOD wine
-Write an entire Wikipedia page about myself
-Be in fantastic shape physically
-Be able to express who I am with my clothes and accessories
-See indigenous people dance a traditional dance in Africa that is not done just for tourists
-Own, with my tribe, amazing land in amador county with big veggie & flower gardens, lots of beautiful structures (outdoor bath, sauna, yurts for living in, women's hut, meditation space, outdoor kitchen, etc), and either a river or natural springs flowing through the property, on this property, lead creativity & healing workshops and movement, with a huge space for movement/play/art with silks, and cushioned floors...lots of bright colors and people from the world-over come to take & teach classes and there's lots of exchange and mutual teaching/learning; people come to be part of this community space, and we have incredible chefs, all organic, super healthy, high vibrational food, gardens, structures and animals, everyone has their roles and their freedoms with lots of encouragement to go out and gain new knowledge/skills to bring back in and share; everything is run off solar, water from catchment systems/springs, completely sustainable and in tune with environment, structures are made from local, natural materials
-Be blissful & ever evolving and have become a powerful shaman with my, insights and magic
-My closest circle of friends/family are very close and have solid trust and presence with one another, we are powerful healers and teachers and have abundance in all areas of our lives
-Be a skilled dancer & artist as well as a masterful lover
-Have a well-established channel of communication with Spirit and able to positively touch thousands of lives through this bond
-Flow freely & safely through time in any direction, transport myself through time and space with my thoughts
-Travel the world and make positive impact each place I visit, starting or assisting with a healing project that is for the highest and best of the people/land/creatures
-Link with family, sisters and friends in the dream world and create positive change, and play
-Govern my time as i please, spending all the time i choose with myself, family & friends, with ease, pleasure and comfort
-Have an elegant, colorful wardrobe with lots of unique, magical accessories
-Have a super fun loving romantic relationship with husband
-Swim/dive with whales in the sea
-Drive a VW van and paint it groovy colors!

Granting Myself Permission

2010-03-19T12:29:00.000-07:00

Where did I get the idea that you can only have one BIG dream per lifetime? Who or what put that limiting thought in my head and heart? I think I'd like to dismantle it and send it on its way. No, I KNOW I'd like to do that.

For the past two and a half years I have been letting a dream unfold in my life. A dream that I didn't even know I had. I started belly dancing more than 10 years ago. In fits and starts. I thought I'd NEVER get anywhere with it. I'd always be a novice beginner. But Spirit had different plans. Thank you!

The path in a really quick recap: someone moved to my area offering classes, she started a troupe and invited me to join, she moved, troupe fell apart, no direction, got frustrated, someone planted the seed that I teach, HA! Big pause.

NO way. "I'm not worthy." So my inner critic deemed.

Somehow, somewhere, I pushed through. The recap continues: I offered a class. Women came. I started a troupe. More classes. A studio space. Organized events. Opened a store. And it's not done, I know there's more.

But. I still have a day job. It's not big enough to support me. Will it ever? Can I let go and trust. Okay. I will. I am. But.

But, what if that's not enough? What if I still have other dreams?

"What? Awfully greedy aren't we? You want MORE? Come on. Isn't this more than you could have ever dreamed of in the first place?"

And my intuition, my heart, my soul, says most definitely, "YES, I deserve more!"

Really? No way! This I have a hard time believing.

So for today, I am granting myself permission. Here's what I grant:

I, Tracy Carlton, have permission to have more than one dream. And those dreams can be EVEN bigger!

Right on!

If you haven't signed up for Mondo Beyondo yet, what's stopping you? OMG! This course is knocking my socks off! Thank you Andrea and Jen!

Transformation

2010-03-17T16:45:00.000-07:00

In our culture death has got a bad rap. We are quite afraid of it. But death is also transformation. Perhaps a more difficult transformation for those that are still here, but a transformation nonetheless.

Death has visited our little hollow this week. Something ~ we still haven't found out what it is ~ died. There has been a nonstop gathering of Ravens and Turkey Vultures in the trees. Squawking. Swooping. Cawing. Staring. Snacking. We've seen bits of bright red blobs here and there, but whatever it is they are feasting on, remains unknown for now.

The latin name for Turkey Vulture is Cathartes aura. Cathartes is Latinized from Greek and means "purifier," aura is Latinized from the Native Mexican word for the bird, auroura. It is often translated as Golden Transformer.

If we choose to look at death not as an ending, but as transformation, which many cultures around the globe have done in the past, and others still do today, we can see the gift that awaits.

My life is in the middle of transforming right now. Maybe not on a tangible level, but on a deeper, more soulful level (which leads to the tangible I believe). That I have had the presence of death outside my home this past week is reminding me that from death comes birth. The great cycle of life. Doors may be closing, yet others are opening.

Angels Calling

2010-03-17T16:41:00.000-07:00

A few days ago my phone rang.

When I answered it there was the most beautiful harp music.

And that's all.

And after a few moments, they hung up.

I have decided it was an Angel calling me.

Letting me know that everything is all right.

That she is watching over me.

All is good.

And this, is such a nice feeling.

I'm going with it.

Any miracles in your world recently?

Open and Ready

2010-03-16T10:37:00.000-07:00

At the beginning of this year I was introduced to a blog of a very creative and beautiful soul. Her blog led me to a couple other highly creative individuals. And then to another person that is creative and says YES to life. And it turns out that all of these fabulous women knew each other. Then I realized, oh my gosh, I went to high school with one of them! I love this. I am a firm believer in synchronicity. I felt drawn in. Connected somehow on some level. And I'm okay with not knowing what it all means. Just sitting with it. But I knew I was tapping into something deep within.

I have been moved and inspired and opened up by each and every one of them. Through their words and images they have offered me examples~permission~the go-ahead to move toward my dreams. I am taking an online course right now, offered by two of these remarkable women, that has split me in two. And rather than feeling torn apart, some magnificent treasures have emerged from the very center of my being. It's awesome. Giving myself the space to dream VERY big has already gifted me with results, who would have thunk it? And we're only just starting week two!

When first discovering their projects, blogs and websites I was especially drawn to Jen Lemen's Picture Hope. I poured over the photos, the words, the history. I found myself in tears. Why? Why such a strong reaction? Was it the lives, the challenges, the beauty of her friends' stories? Or was it her journey, her experiences, the images she's shared? Yes, it was all of those things. But I knew, deep down, on a different level, it wasn't about the people I was learning about, or the story that was unfolding in her life. No, when I sat with it, I knew. Africa was calling me. Somehow. In some way.

I have been to Africa twice in my life, during my 20's, both times through a friend that was living there, in different places, in different jobs. The first time she was a peace corps volunteer in Kenya, and I spent six glorious weeks in Kenya and Tanzania. I am sure I learned more about myself during that time than anything else on that journey. The second time was when she and her husband were in the diplomatic corps in Senegal and I spent four weeks discovering many parts of the country and even helping in an official evacuation of Liberia. I had my world turned upside down both times. Filled up. Fabulous. And Grateful.

But that was quite a few years ago. And yet, when I look over the past 15 years or so, I see there were other times where, if I had been paying attention, Africa has been knocking on my heart.

So here I am. With my Mondo-Beyondo-Dream-Big List, and Africa was the first thing that went on it. Without a doubt. Without knowing why. I don't know what it means. And I don't know what part of Africa, which country. And I don't know how. But it's there. For some reason, it has to be there.

I have been learning, s-l-o-w-l-y, that when you are on your *path*, when you are in your groove, when you are doing exactly what you were put on this Earth to do, the Universe~Spirit~God delivers exactly what you need to continue. If only we pay attention!

And so I'm paying attention! Last week at work, right next to my box of tea, was a Dixie cup with Diego (of Diego and Dora fame, if you have children this makes sense to you), and the cup had Diego and his African Adventure. Hah! That cup now sits on my desk. Permission to remember that something is calling to me and to be open to it.

Then, yesterday, too wild! From the mail, THIS was sitting on the kitchen table, a thank you postcard from a dear friend, who lives just over the hill from me:

Okay. Yes. I'm awake. I'm paying attention. I am Open. And ready!

2010-03-12T11:31:00.000-08:00

Running is something that comes and goes in my life. I haven't run in over 5 years, since before my son was born. This past year I've taken up walking. It feels okay. I am not totally inspired. But I am moving.

A couple weeks ago on my walk I actually jogged for about 5oo feet. Wow. I didn't think I could do it. Sure, I was panting and wheezing, but I did it! Then, I did it 2 more times that week. Accomplishment!

That very same week my dearest friend in the whole world sent me an email titled *Walging* a word she coined that combines walking and jogging. An activity she described as jogging a very short distance until the gasping for air and pain in ones legs forces you walk. When breathing returns to normal then one tries jogging again, if even for only a very short distance.

And here we were doing the very same thing, at the exact same time. I love being in sync like that!

Today, what is just so exciting, is that I actually jogged almost the whole way!!! Yay for me! And not only that, I RAN! Ever since I wheezed my way through my first cross country race at age 14, I've always loved the last 100 yards or so, when I know I'm almost there, that the journey has been hard, that it's all down hill from here, I can pick up my feet, let them go and run, FAST!

It's like flying. It's a high. I love it.

And so this is perfect for how I feel at this point in my life. I have been going slow and steady with lots of starts and stops towards my dreams. And today, here and now, I feel, I am not only moving at a steady pace toward them, I am RUNNING, I am FLYING to them.

It's awesome.

Small Acts

2010-03-10T22:01:00.000-08:00

I am on only day 3 of my Mondo Beyondo course, LOVING it!

Small acts during your day make all the difference.

Dreaming BIG!

2010-03-07T07:05:00.000-08:00

This year is my word is Surrender.

I chose it {it chose me?} because I'm usually an uber-planner. This year seemed like a good year to let go of the usual goals and preconceived ideas about who I should be or what I should be doing. This year I am open to the magic of the Universe. I am paying attention and trying out new things. I am still discerning, but experimenting with new directions too.

And in the few short months that is this year, I kept coming across this Mondo Beyondo online course. Again and again, in different blogs, on Facebook... there it was again. Okay. I'm paying attention! I signed up!!

Mondo Beyondo is all about dreaming BIG, going beyond the small dreams, allowing for the huge dreams to come through, and then pursuing them.

Sounds like planning and goals a little bit. And yes, it is. But! These are not the everyday life practical goals {though they can be}. This is the chance to embrace and move towards what I never thought possible before.

I'm so excited! I start tomorrow. They still have space, sign up here.

I plan on sharing what I'm doing here, as a way of daring myself to follow-through.

To be BRAVE!

Here we go...!!!

Taking Risks

2010-02-28T09:12:00.000-08:00

This is my year for being brave. I'm taking risks.

I'm moving towards what scares me.

For me, that's ART.

What is it for you? What scares you?

Join me on the ride, won't you?

Playing

2010-02-16T09:38:00.000-08:00

I am learning about mixed media and collages from the fabulous

Kelly Rae Roberts through her book Taking Flight.

Here is my first attempt.

A Puddle Jumper. One half of a pair of Galoshes.

I experimented with materials, didn't have some on hand that would have made it easier, but had just so much fun in the creative process. {My inner critic was bound and gagged and made to sit outside, she's still out there now as a matter of fact.}

It's part of My Path of Bravery this year, sharing this here...affirming out loud that I can do this!

Thanks for sharing this with me!

Intention

2010-02-15T14:35:00.000-08:00

I learned that it is during the first two weeks of the New Year (yesterday ushered in the Year of the Tiger) that your intention needs to be at its most purposeful. For you are setting up your intent for the entire year. Or perhaps the gods are listening the most intently during this time of year when everything is fresh and new?

My intent. Finally. Is to draw - paint - create. This year. And the next. And beyond.

Hear me roar!

Love & Inspiration

2010-02-10T13:02:00.000-08:00

In "honor" of the oh-so tedious Hallmark Valentine's day, rather than celebrate the day with obligatory chocolates, pointless gifts, and a mass-produced card, I feel pulled instead to notice and spread the joy of Nature's Love. Let's celebrate Love of all kinds, not only the romantic this Valentine's day.

Here are some hearts that I found right in my back yard.

Magical!

I was inspired by Kelly Rae Roberts, who finds hearts wherever she goes, and encourages others to do the same. She's inspiring in many other ways as well. Check out her blog and her website.

She has also inspired me to follow my heart, to do what I've spent my adult life yearning for, but have been too afraid to embrace completely. ART! Painting, drawing, collaging... YES! I am finally saying YES to my creativity, to art, and to my heart. I'm ready.

I'll be using this blog to share my journey, to share my art, and to encourage others to do the same.

It's a monumental step, here I go! Thanks for being here, along for the ride.

So this weekend, notice, honor and spread the Love wherever you go ~ starting with yourself: love who you are, your gifts and talents, and all that you have to offer the world!

Let's go!

Change

2010-02-05T14:04:00.000-08:00

Change.

The only constant "they" say.

Changes are in the air. For this blog.

For me.

Intention.

I am setting my intention here.

Change. Time to change. Time to claim. Time to SOAR!

Join me in the journey!

It's going to be a wild ride. I'm so excited!!!

Creating, Creativity, Joy

2010-01-26T14:31:00.000-08:00

Here's what I've been creating...

A new hip belt for our next costume. The front anyway.

How about you? What are you creating these days?

Synchronicity, Magic, Connection, Wonder

2010-01-26T09:40:00.000-08:00

I believe in magic.

Synchronicity is a kind of magic.

Invisible threads woven out of site ~ linking, connecting, joining each of us to what & who we are truly meant to be with, so that we may be who we are truly meant to be.

If only we pay attention.

And trust. That you are being presented a glimpse (or whallop on the head) of something essential, a vital clue to who you are.

And like a spider web, strand by strand, an entire scene will unfold before your eyes, if you trust, if you follow, if you open your heart.

Stay open to the magic.

I have discovered a thread very recently, I'm so excited to see where it leads! A blog I follow of an inspiring and beautiful dancer, introduced to me to another blog, which led me to this amazing group of creative, courageous women, and their blogs, and their magic. And then, there in one photo was someone I recognized? Yes, someone I went to high school with.

Small world? Synchronicity. Magic. Connection. Wonder.

I am so excited by the possibilities.

Solstice Musings

2009-12-21T10:44:00.000-08:00

I have been a self-proclaimed List Queen for as long as I can remember. I come by it honestly, my mom has always kept to-do lists: daily reminders of what needs to be done. My maternal grandfather, the king of lists, even kept one on his honeymoon, dutifully recording each mile, gallon of gas, and penny spent as he and my grandmother traveled from Pennsylvania down to Florida, and then on to Cuba. Quite the romantic, him!

I have come to rely on my lists as useful tools in helping me keep track of the many projects, tasks, and goals going on in my life at any given moment. They have assisted my outcome-oriented personality since high school, when I clearly remember setting the first goals for myself: I decided that I wanted to one, join the small-flag team, and two, play the cello. I succeeded in making the flag team, but realized quickly it was the idea of playing the cello that seemed appealing, not the reality. So I have also been good at knowing it's important to let a goal go by the wayside in order to make room for new ones, and that lessons can be learned in the process~from the successes~as well as from the “failures.”

This goal setting has helped me accomplish many things over the years, introducing me to new places, new people, gaining new skills, and learning much about myself along the way. I hosted a college radio show, joined a cycling club, moved to Japan, backpacked around Asia, lived in Europe, got a Masters degree, started a non-profit organization, and most recently, opened a belly dance studio and store. I’ve kept busy.

The lists that accompany these many adventures helped me stay organized and focused along the way. I’ve enjoyed listing out the steps needed, checking them off dutifully as they were accomplished, adding more items as needed, and making new lists to carry me onward.

But I’m keenly aware that when life is planned out step-by-step, with no room for spontaneity or sudden inspiration, much can be missed. In my mid-twenties my goal was to move to the Czech Republic. It didn’t matter that I was very inspired and intrigued--right where I was at the time--by Thailand, and even offered an opportunity to stay there. I had a plan. Move on I must. Yet it turns out my time in Eastern Europe was quite lonely and depressing, not at all what I had “planned.” For years I wondered what would have happened if I had followed my heart, my intuition, and stayed put, instead of keeping to my schedule. What did I miss out on, by being so “organized?”

As this year draws to an end, I’ve come across many blogs and postings suggesting how one can achieve anything you want if you set your goals and regularly check in on how you’re doing. They offer templates for plans, grids, outlines, and list-keeping tools to help you along the way. I imagine if you have bumbled about in life not sure how you’ve come to be in the place you are at, these tools are instrumental in helping you find focus, meaning and direction in our chaotic world.

For myself, I have lived this way all of my adult life. I think it’s time for something new. This Winter Solstice, as the Sun turns towards the light on the great wheel of life~my “New Year”~I can’t help but wonder, what have I missed? What has my heart, my spirit, my soul, been calling out for me to do or be, that I have not heard for all of the lists, the goals, and the plans crowded into my life?

So I bravely embark on a different kind of journey this year, one filled without plans, goals, or schedules (this just may drive my friends, family and colleagues nuts ~ please bear with me!). Instead I open my heart to its song, to the music of the trees, to the inspiration of spirit.

And yet it is not about just being blown by the wind, this way or that, directionless and at the mercy of whatever energy is nearby. It is a chance to truly hear my soul’s voice, to find out what I may have been missing in all the structure. It is living in the present, open to spontaneity, honoring the now of life, letting go of worries about the future or the “should of’s” of the past.

This in and of itself may sound like a “plan” for the year. And in a way it is. But one of a very different nature. A new adventure indeed! I am very excited!

Blessings for the Solstice and this New Year,
Indigo

Anything Really Is Possible

2009-09-11T11:28:00.001-07:00

What is possible? Anything.

Really?

Yes, really!

We can do anything we set our mind and heart to.

Of course, there is that little factor of FEAR to overcome. Fear of failure, fear of success, fear of ridicule, fear of criticism, fear of ... I'm sure you have a armada of words to insert there.

But what do we have to lose, really?

What is our alternative? To let FEAR keep us back? Then we can safely sit where we're at, saying, well, yes, but that's just too scary, so better to do what is "just okay", rather than soul-fulfilling and inspiring and spectacular.

Is this really okay with you? So-so. Safe. Secure.

Bored, stifled, asleep, frustrated, jealous, lethargic...?

No, not really.

The Turkey Vulture, Cathartes aura, Golden Transformer, spiraling upward, higher and higher, maybe a little wobble here and there, but self-correcting, not hesitating, not doubtful, soaring higher and higher, transforming all that needs to be transformed.

There are invisible currents, ready to spiral us higher and higher. But it requires Faith and Trust, knowing they are there. Taking those risks anyway!

Transform your fear into action, try it, if something doesn't turn out the way you'd hoped, then there is a lesson to learn, and the reward of knowing that you DID IT ANYWAY! And then you move onto the next challenge. Growing, stretching, pushing beyond what you think is possible. Embracing even more than you could have ever imagined.

And...
...knowing that you are not alone on this journey, there are many of us reaching and stretching and pushing the limits everyday. Being part of a community ~ virtual or otherwise ~ of friends that will say to you, YES, GO FOR IT! or YOU ARE NOT CRAZY for wanting to pursue your dreams. Those are the ones you must seek out. I am one. I am seeking others of like mind.

Let's join together, encouraging each other higher and higher.

Beyond even our WILDEST dreams.

Are you with me?

Tribal Twilight: an Evening of Belly Dance

2009-08-25T10:37:00.000-07:00

Hello Friends of Kundalini Belly Dance!

This Friday is the day!!

Tribal Twilight: An Evening of Belly Dance ~ and a Benefit for Khylee!

Clark's Corner Cafe in Ione.
Friday, August 28 from 8-9:30pm

(with an intermission)

This will be our 2nd show at Clark's and will be a special benefit for Khylee Monson and her family. In lieu of a cover charge, donations will go to Khylee and her family. For more information about Khylee see below, and please visit the website www.Just-One-Dollar.com

We'll have dancers from all over the foothills and Sacramento!
Last time we had standing room only, get there early for a seat!

Hope to see you there!

********************************

On June 11, 2009, 4-year-old Khylee Monson of Pioneer was diagnosed with a brain tumor that her doctors say is terminal. We are hoping for a miracle, and Khylee’s family can use all the help they can get! Friends of Khylee and her mom, Jackie Harrison, have formed the fundraising group, For Khlyee’s Sake, and are asking for your donation. All money raised will go to help pay for her medical care. You can donate at any Bank of Amador (Jackson, Pioneer, or Ione) or by going to http://www.just-one-dollar.com/. For tax-deductible donations, please send a check or money order to the Amador Community Foundation.

Tracy Carlton
Kundalini Dance
Belly Dance...Sacred Dance
Classes, Workshops, Performance Troupe

www.kundalinidance.com

209.419-1362

13 Daily Doses of Intention

2009-07-27T15:04:00.000-07:00

I find that even though I believe in the idea of being present, of living not only life, but also each moment, with intention, I still get caught up in the "tasks" of daily life and end up going about my day distracted, in a rush, or at the very least, lost in thoughts or worries that have nothing to do with the present moment. Intention gets lost in the dust.

On a typical day, I jump up out of bed before the alarm has even gone off because my four year old is already heading down the stairs and ready for breakfast. Then the morning continues at a less than leisurely pace in order to keep to a school or work schedule. And it can be non-stop from then on for the rest of the day. I'll then find myself with my head on the pillow, ready to sleep at the end of the day, wanting to acknowledge all that I am grateful for that day...but find myself quickly drifting off to sleep before I get past "Thank you for today...".

So I decided to come up with a tool for myself, a tool to help me make Intention a greater part of my daily life. And, not a surprise to anyone that knows me, this tool happens to be a list. I LOVE lists. I am the list queen! I have many things I'd like to accomplish in my life and my many lists help me stay centered and grounded. And though they are lists that have daily tasks, the focus is more on big projects and long-term goals. They do not necessarily address the day to day routines.

So in going about creating my check list, I spent quite a bit of time allowing it to emerge organically, better reflecting who I am over time, rather than jumping into a plan that wasn't truly me. I also have committed it to memory, so that at any given point in the day, I can review it to myself and see how I'm doing that day.

My list gives me focus. It brings the idea of intention into a tangible form ~ not just an idea that sounds good. And just having this tool to reflect on, whether I've adhered to it or not, has made me stop and pause for a moment ~ which really, pausing is the intent! Granted, there are some days when I forget about it entirely, but they are becoming fewer and fewer in number.

Now, this list is for me, and if you like the idea and decide to create one for yourself, make sure it reflects you, not me. After all, you are the one that it’s for ~ make sure it fits your life! And why 13 you may ask? Well, 13 is a sacred number in a lot of cultures, and I strongly resonate with it. But you can use any number you'd like, start with just 1 item if that's all you want to take on at this point. Just be careful to not overwhelm yourself from the get go, you'll just end up tossing it aside in frustration!

There are definitely days when I only get to 5 or 8 items on my list, but I am just glad that I'm doing SOME of them. It's taking the first step that matters, not the destination, right?

So here goes ~ and these are NOT in any order of importance by the way, they are ALL important to me, but it was too hard to draw a circle with all the components in this blog format. If you're more of a visual person, that may be the better way to go than a list anyway!

13 Daily Doses of Intention
1. Give thanks for today and for this life.
2. Give thanks to the four elements (Air, Fire, Water, Earth), because it is with them that I create something new and change the universe for the better each day.
3. Identify one way I will change the universe (ie: myself) for the better.
4. Play with my son.
5. Connect with my husband.
6. Walk or dance (some physical activity each day)
7. Be outdoors.
8. Have alone time.
9. Be quiet, do nothing, breathe. (sometimes I get #7-9 all at the same time!)
10. Identify one thing I will create today. This can be dance, a meal, art, sewing...whatever taps into my creative talents and expresses who I am.
11. Create that something (see #9).
12. Give thanks to someone, acknowledge their gifts and presence in my life.
13. Learn something new.

Reviewing my list each morning (even if that means at 10:00 in the morning), and then again during the day, and finally at night, I am able to stop long enough to insert intention into my day. And the idea really, is to make it a habit. The more I do it, the more it becomes just a part of my day, rather than something I have to “remember” to do. And eventually, the list itself will become obsolete.

But then, that will mean that it’s simply time to create a new list of some kind!

Blessings on the journey!

Indigo

Big Flea Market Thank You!

2009-07-25T19:23:00.001-07:00

Thank you to everyone who participated in the flea market today!

Thanks to the vendors and all of your fabulous goodies: Ursula, Thalisha & Brandi of Nyx (and Richard too!), Sonya, Lesley, Patti, Kimberly(who we missed today) & Leslie for Sandy. The studio was transformed by all the beautiful items you brought to sell!

Thank you to the many local folks who came to say hi, support the vendors, learn more about belly dance, and are a part of this community! Nice to see so many familiar faces!

Thank you Thalisha and Brandi for the scrumptous blueberry coffee cake, YUM!

For those that couldn't make it, we missed you! Hope to see you at the next one!

Thank you to the local belly dance community! I am so honored to be part of it!

These are the 4 photos I took before my camera stopped working!

Many thanks and blessings, Tracy

PS: Jane! So wonderful to have finally met you ~ thank you for taking the time to stop by! For everyone reading, here's a link to Jane's most wonderful blog: http://medicinetree.wordpress.com/

Belly Dancer's Flea Market!

2009-07-21T11:33:00.000-07:00

A first ever Kundalini Belly Dancer's Flea Market!

Join our local dance community!

You can find all sorts of goodies, whether you dance or not!

Hope to see you there!

Tracy

Going Local - A Community Garden Upcountry

2009-07-12T13:08:00.000-07:00

Yesterday we helped start a new community garden in Pioneer.

About 10 folks turned out to turn a bare patch of earth into the beginnings of our own local food fest and community gathering spot. Thanks must go to Sean Kriletich of UC Cooperative Extension and the Amador County Recreation Agency for bringing the idea and the day about.

The garden is located at the Mollie Joyce Environmental Center. Earlier this year Fred Joyce, a fourth generation Amador resident in his 80's, generously donated the 80 acres to the Amador County Recreation Agency. He decided to give it to the recreation agency to honor his grandmother's wishes - to help children and youth.

Currently the house is being used for photography classes and has a room that's been converted into a dark room. The new garden, out back, though small to start out, has lots of room to grow and expand, depending on the interest of the community.

In just 3 hours so much was accomplished! Fence posts put in, a fence put up, two garden beds and some paths formed (using resources right at hand - old logs and large stones to border the beds), vegetables planted, irrigation put down, and pine needle mulch spread out on the paths and beds (also found right near the garden under the nearby towering pines).

Sean shared the many benefits of mulching with those gathered (for example: regulating the temperature of the soil, keeping moisture locked in, suppressing weed growth, and as it decomposes, instant compost). Our 4 year-old son even pitched in an helped haul the pine needles over to the garden spot. Sustainable gardening from the get go! Using resources at hand, rather than hauling in and paying for outside materials that come from miles away.

We look forward to nurturing this little plot of soil, getting to know our local neighbors, and sharing our passion for sustainable, local food sources with others.

Alas, we all forgot our cameras yesterday, so all the hard work being done isn't shown here! But I returned today to make sure we had some photos. At least you can see the lovely and humble results!

Share the news, and if you live upcountry, visit the garden! And stay tuned for the next work party.

I’m a Medicine Woman Too!

2009-07-03T20:52:00.000-07:00

More sharing from the wonderful world of Anima !

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I’m a Medicine Woman Too! - Signed Hardback Copies & Free Art Gift - Please Forward and Post

“Please buy our new book and share it with lots of people. It has lots of powerful things to teach, about herbs, and about believing in ourselves! And I would love to hear from you how you love it!” -Rhiannon Hardin, (soon to be 9!)

—————————————————————————————————–

Finally available, personally signed hardback copies, with a FREE signed Medicine Woman art print ready for framing:

I’M A MEDICINE WOMAN TOO!
Herbal Wisdom & Personal Empowerment for Budding Healers & Daydream Believers

An illustrated story of self discovery and personal empowerment for all children and adults alike… and not only for budding healers but everyone heeding a calling, seeking a purpose or pursuing a vital dream

Written & Illustrated by
Jesse Wolf Hardin

“I believe I’m holding a new children’s classic, a book that will be treasured by children –and their parents – for years to come.”
-Rosemary Gladstar, Herbalist, author of The Family Herbal

The author’s delightful daughter Rhiannon was the inspiration and model for this tale of realization and growth, as she first resists believing she could ever be a Medicine Woman like the herbalists and healers she’s met, but then realizes the ways in which she is already the woman of power she hopes to be! Includes a “Name the Herb” medicinal plant identification game.

Notice: The first 250 people to order will receive a FREE hand signed and numbered (limited edition of 250) color print of a new “The Medicine Woman Tradition” drawing by the author and illustrator, as seen below, ready for you to frame and hang! Rhiannon was the model, along with Mama Kiva of course!

Personally Signed Copies

In the US: $15. Donation + $6.50 Priority Shipping

In Mexico & Canada: $15. Donation + $9.00 Shipping

International Orders: $15. Donation + $11.00 Shipping

3 Signed Copies: $40. Donation + $10. Priority Shipping

Click here for book excerpts or to place your order

And click here for information on Animá Medicine Woman Courses & Events

When ordering directly from us instead of somewhere like Amazon, you should know that only $7 of the cost goes to the publisher, Hops Press, whereas the other $8 is able to help support the continued restoration of the Animá Botanical Sanctuary and our Medicine Woman herbal and lifeways school!

Be sure to tell us the name of the person you would like it signed to, and a little about you or them!

Finally, you likely understand the degree to which we depend on people like you to spread the word about “I’m a Medicine Woman Too!” and its message of personal empowerment to others who might benefit and enjoy. If you know of any independent book stores or herb shops that might want to carry it, please take a minute to show them your copy and suggest they contact Hops Press directly for wholesale quantities. And when emailing your friends about it or posting on forums and blogs, kindly include our Medicine Woman Too website address: www.medicinewomantoo.com The site includes excerpts and more art samples as well as PayPal buttons for easy ordering of your signed copies.

We sure appreciate you interest and help, and Rhiannon as well as all of us would indeed LOVE to hear you impressions of this book and how it affects you, as well as any reactions or responses from its younger readers.

————————

The Author & Illustrator

Jesse Wolf Hardin is the author of 7 books and over 500 published articles, a teacher of Animá nature-inspired practice and cofounder of the Animá Medicine Woman tradition. He and his partners offer empowering online courses, as well as counsel and healing consultations, retreats and Summer events at their botanical sanctuary in the enchanted wildlands of Southwest New Mexico. His work has been praised by luminaries from Gary Snyder, Paul Winter, Edward Abbey and Joanna Macy to Terry Tempest Williams.

“Wolf’s work helps us to see the world as whole – even holy.”
–Terry Tempest Williams

“My initial inspiration,” the author writes, “included not only my daughter Rhiannon, but all those kids who from an early age seem inclined towards self exploration, challenge and growth, sometimes longing for meaning and a special purpose as much as they desire fun and love. This includes the fortunate daughters of herbalists and healers, looking for affirmation, positive archetypes and strong women models to look up to…. as well as all the other little girls who seem called to tend and heal, or who feel drawn to the amazing ways of nature and intimate company of plants. It was halfway through putting this book together that I realized I was actually doing it for every child including little boys – and indeed every person regardless of their years on the planet – who might be able to benefit from it’s core theme: learning to believe in ourselves enough to dare to live our dreams.”

——–

“I felt the voice of the Earth Mother herself speak from the pages of I’m A Medicine Woman Too!. The sense of presence and higher awareness will benefit younger and those with accumulated years as well. A fine offering to raise consciousness!”
-Margi Flint AHG HM, author of The Practicing Herbalist

“A book thoroughly enjoyed by both myself and my little boys, I’m a Medicine Woman, Too! entices us not to look to others for ourselves, but rather to go within and bring out what we are, and know in doing so that we give the world around us what it needs. That such an important insight is accompanied by such beautiful images makes this book even more of a treasure.
-Jim McDonald, astute Herbalist and teacher

“I’m a Medicine Woman, Too! is full of wisdom, beauty and encouragement not only for young girls, but for people of all ages. The author’s exquisite illustrations quickly draw the reader in and cleverly teach about healing plants. A high recommend for empowering all medicine women!”
-Lesley Tierra, author of Healing with the Herbs of Life

“This is just the kind of story I want my children hearing over and over – the kind of story that will help them grow into themselves with grace and beauty.”
-Kimberly Gallagher, M.Ed., CCH, LearningHerbs.com & HerbMentor.com

“I’m a Medicine Woman, Too! is a wonderful book to connect children with herbal traditions. The story role-models an ethic of healing and caring for other people and honoring our elders. The delightful illustrations touch the reader at an emotional level, compelling us to become healers too.”
-Thomas J. Elpel, author of Botany in a Day and Shanleya’s Quest

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I’m a Medicine Woman, Too!
by Jesse Wolf Hardin
© Hops Press 2009, 8.5×11” Hardcover, 48 pages
35 Full Color Illustrations ISBN 978-1-892784-31-5

The Two Most Important Questions in the Universe*

2009-06-25T12:29:00.000-07:00

*According to Chris Guillebeau

The other day I was led to the website and blog of Chris Guillebeau, The Art of Nonconformity - Unconventional Strategies for Life, Work, and Travel. I highly recommend it for those of you looking to live your life with more purpose, especially those of you looking for tools to help you find your purpose, and also for some very entertaining writing.

In his manifesto, A Brief Guide to World Domination (not what you might think it is), he encourages anyone looking to live a life less conventional, to live a life instead filled with purpose, to ask yourself these two most important questions in the universe:

1. What do you really want to get out of life?

2. What can you offer the world that no one else can?

Okay they may seem daunting at first, but try it out, ask yourself these questions, and be honest when you answer.

The challenge for me, and perhaps many others, is in not stopping myself before I even get started. Plenty of nay-sayer voices came rushing to the forefront trying to tell me, for example, all the reasons why I couldn't possibly have something unique to offer the world. I had to tell them, "HUSH! You've had plenty of air time in my life, no more! Now it's time for the affirmative answers to step forward and be heard."

And what did they say? Here they are:

What do you really want to get out of life?
~choose at each moment, what I am going to do or be (it is no one else’s choice but mine)
~dance in sisterhood
~a relationship with a certain patch of Earth, interwoven with a web of family and friends
~grounded, and able to fly
~life enriching experiences, at home and abroad
~make beautiful things, make things beautiful
~no regrets

What can you offer the world that no one else can?
~my life as an example of living life outside the box
~belly dance - giving women permission to do something for themselves, having fun, and trying something different
~encouraging others to find what they are here in this life to create (be it one big thing, or several small) and how they can give to others through their creation
~doing all of that beautifully
~combining all of the above into my own unique way and offering it up to the world!

And now, the next step, checking in on every single area of my life to see how these two above questions are being answered, or not. Yikes. Big committment, but I'm worth it.

By the way, I do believe it's possible to do something you love while giving back and doing something for others. It usually works out better for everyone if you love what you're doing, whether it's for yourself or for others. Afterall, if you don't love what you're doing, what are you waiting for? (I have my own challenges in this area!) And if the way you give to others is less than satisfying, ask yourself if the world really needs more martyrs? Probably not.

And I'd love to hear your answers to those questions! Please share!

Happy discoveries!

The Art of Nonconformity

2009-06-23T13:56:00.000-07:00

This blog, by Chris Guillebeau, is, well, just absolutely fantastic.
Here's a post I thought I'd share.
Check out the blog yourself! The Art of Nonconformity
Unless you would rather be Unremarkabely Average. It's a choice, always.

February 18, 2008
How to Be Unremarkably Average

Simple Tips for a Risk-Free Life:
Accept what people tell you at face value. Surround yourself with people who think like you. Don’t stand out. Stay close to home. Get a normal job. Do things the way everyone else does, because there has to be a method to the madness.

College
Go to college because someone said you should get a degree, not because you want to learn anything. Take four years to finish, or maybe even five. No one’s counting. Take out student loans to “invest in yourself.” Follow the plan in your course catalog even if you hate some of the classes. Believe your advisor when she says you have to do things a certain way. Jump through hoops. Check off boxes.

Personal Finance
Use your credit card as your primary means of spending. Get the largest mortgage you can qualify for. Fill it with plasma TVs and expensive furniture. Buy a big, new car and complain about the cost of gas. Spend all you earn, or maybe even more than you earn. The government will help you if there’s a recession. Spend money on things you don’t want but will help you impress others. Give token amounts of money to charity. Change the channel when a charity appeal comes on. Believe the 3,000 marketing messages that the average person in the U.S. and Canada receives every day. You need things you’ve never heard of before because they will help you feel better about yourself. You deserve to buy luxury products because you’ve earned the right through your hard work.

Travel
Go overseas once or twice in your life, to somewhere safe like England. Tell everyone what a great cross-cultural experience it was to visit London. (“They talk so differently over there!”) Wherever you go, make absolutely sure that you will be safe and comfortable. McDonald’s is now in 119 countries, so you can always find something good to eat. If you want to be brave, go to somewhere like Mexico. Never travel unaccompanied to any place “really foreign.” Don’t try to speak any language other than English. If people don’t understand you, speak louder. Africa is for safaris and Asia is for cities with big shopping malls. Don’t drink the water!

Work
Work at a job you don’t like for the majority of your professional life. Sit at a desk 40 hours a week for an average of 10 hours of productive work. One day, the corner cubicle will be all yours. Until then, get really good at Minesweeper. Read every article on CNN.com every day. Attend useless meetings. Take the credit when things go right. Put the blame on someone else when things go wrong. Never take responsibility for anything. When you fail at something, resolve to never try again. Form alliances of convenience to survive office conflict. When you are forced to mediate a disagreement, make your judgment on the basis of personality instead of principle. To advance in management, don’t confront anyone and only give positive reviews. Instead of trying to fix big problems, focus on unproductive work that everyone notices. In times of crisis, wonder out loud what someone will do. Polish the deck chairs on the Titanic.

Authority
Don’t question authority; it’s there for a good reason. Believe in and actively defend “the way things used to be” even if your memory is hazy about when that actually was. Feel threatened by new ideas. Never be the voice of dissent. Support your country’s foreign policy when it is popular and reject it when it is unpopular. Don’t wonder about someone’s motivations for pursuing one choice over another.

***
Don’t worry, be happy
Don’t worry about being average, because no one will ever question you about it. Average is the status quo. Politicians pander to the average out of political necessity. When they try to promote their own unconventional ideas, they quickly learn how risky it is to be truly different. If you go through life following this advice, you’ll find yourself in good company with virtually everyone who lives an unremarkably average life.

What more could you want?

The Unexpected Gift

2009-06-18T14:46:00.000-07:00

Last weekend, just after my husband and I were talking about the challenging financial times (ours personally, not globally), our dryer broke. Hmmm… no extra cash this month for such inconveniences. So instead we put up a clothes line. It’s been something we’ve talked about doing for over a year. It makes sense ecologically of course, and with the times, saves some money as well. And so now, out of necessity, we got to it.

And what a great gift this has been, what a delightful shift in our routines! We have, as a result of our “misfortune,” started to live our life more consciously. We have had to actually pay better attention to the weather – no point in starting a load of laundry when it looks like rain (we’ve had unseasonably cool and cloudy weather this June in the foothills). And that habit of starting a load at 8:00 at night? That won’t do – wet clothes sitting for long periods of time take on very unpleasant odors! Wait until morning it must.

The best gift of all though, has been spending more time outside. In the ritual of hanging out the clothes to dry, and then in taking them in again, I have been blessed with shifting my life to more of an outdoor focus. While draping wet towels over the line, I listen to the different birds sing and call out, whether in harmonious joy or in alarm to warn each other of our approaching cats. I feel the gentle breeze on my arms as I pull the clothes pins from their drawstring bag. I watch the turkey vulture soar down the ridge as I hang up the socks. More often than not, I forget what I'm doing and just stop and take it all in. The dark greens of the live oaks contrasting with the bright greens of the black oaks, the trickle of water still meandering in the seasonal creek, and the smell of bear clover and pine trees in the warm morning sun.

Once the clothes are dry, I also now remember that I need to bring them in at the end of the day. As dusk settles over our home, I walk outside and notice the rosy light on the tops of the cedars and pines, I smell the muskiness of a skunk somewhere in the area, and I feel the coolness of day’s end on my skin. Before our clothesline, I may not have ventured out much after dinner, but now, out of necessity, I do so more often. And then, not needing a reason any longer, I instead choose to go outside on my own, without the need to bring in laundry, but rather, to simply experience the many sensations of nature, of the earth – the sights, smells, sounds, and feelings of this beautiful place I call home.

I see no hurry to ever fix our dryer at all. Actually, donating it (after we get it fixed) might be the best thing we could do with it. Hmmm, something to consider!

So I am thankful for this chance to become more conscious in my actions, and in my daily life.

I am grateful for this unexpected gift.

Shaman's Path Intenstive

2009-06-11T10:56:00.000-07:00

Spreading the word ...

Please Forward to Friends & Post to Any Forums– Announcing:
The Shaman Path Intensive(for both men and women)
July 2nd - 5th, 2009
http://www.animacenter.org/

A 3 day intensive held not in a classroom but an ancient Place Of Power. Taught by Jesse Wolf Hardin with Kiva Rose and Loba… with the focus on realizing a deep and experiential understanding of empowered self… and on redefining the role of the contemporary shaman in terms of envisioning possibilities: maximizing awareness, discovering purpose, bridging the worlds, and healing personal and societal imbalance.

“The change of direction can be accomplished only through what Carl Jung has referred to as ‘an obedience to awareness’.”-Joan Halifax The Wounded Healer
Specific topics will depend on the needs and desires of the participants, but may include:• Developing conscious hyperpresence, hyperawareness, hypersentience, precognition and intuition, tapping primal instinct• Sensing, connecting with, drawing energy and discerning lessons from the various manifestations of the earthen spirit.• Recognizing and learning from our kindred spirits, including our animal totems• Reshaping perception• Plant medicines and teachers• Moving energy, and the Animá principals of healing• The Animá Medicine Wheel• Reincorporating the scattered or denied parts of our whole selves. Reintegrating mind, body, heart, spirit and earth.
“A surprising experience; archaic, fresh, future, wild, refined, all at once… my respects to Jesse Wolf Hardin.”-Gary Snyder, Pulitzer Prize-winning author
Together participants walk through the portal of the feeling heart, to enter into deeper connection with the daily miraculous… taking responsibility as potentially powerful, artful co-creators of our world and our reality. Those wishing, have the option of spending a night or more out on a mini-quest, or otherwise customize the weekend experience to best meet their needs.
“Jesse’s voice inspires our passion to take us further — seeing the world whole — even holy.”-Terry Tempest Williams, author of Refuge
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To Participate, Click Here For Your Shaman Path Registration Form:
shamans-path-intensive-registration.doc
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Download this Announcement without photos, to kindly forward and post:
shaman-intensive-announcement.rtf
And click here to read Jesse’s essay: “The Shaman: Awakening the Powers Within”:
5-shaman-path-essay.doc

Logistics & Particulars will be mailed to anyone sending in a Registration Form.
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“Jesse Wolf Hardin has a true understanding of embodied spirituality – the sacred spirit in nature and in human beings… not as an abstraction but in ways sensual, practical, and transformative.” -Starhawk, author of Spiral Dance
“Wolf sings us Full Circle to the raw, sweet wildness within, and calls us forward to the future primeval.”
-Joanna Macy, author of World As Self, World As Lover

Thank you very much for forwarding this announcement, and posting it on any forums or sites you may be involved with.

Sensations of a Morning Walk

2009-05-14T12:04:00.001-07:00

Grosbeaks singing awake the day
Quail taking flight as I tromp by
Sun warming the top of my head
Air heaving in and out of my lungs as I struggle up a hill
Breeze on my skin as it whispers through the trees
Small dogs--big dogs--furry dogs--fat dogs - barking warm wishes or defending their space
Warm smell of bear clover briefly interrupted by diesel fuel
Madrone tree trunks resembling elephant feet – or elephant feet masquerading as Madrones?
Raccoon scat
Faded plastic raccoon poised nearby
Robins singing in call and response
Mosquitoes trying to keep up with me
Someone cooking breakfast
Tummy growling
Wispy clouds floating by
Grin and a wave from a passing elder
Buzzing flies
Hovering bees
Fluttering by blue, white, yellow, butterflies
Crunchy gravel underfoot
Pine needles smelling fine
Ants marching along
Water trickling downhill
Creativity flooding in
Fawn in the road reeling my wandering mind back to now
Tall grasses waving
Wildflowers displaying
Spiders weaving
Welcoming return from a hungry cat.

Living the Good Life

2009-05-03T12:16:00.000-07:00

The soft gurgling and clucking of chickens, raindrops on the greenhouse roof, the smell of freshly snipped sunflower sprouts and the singing of the leaves in the wind...these sensations filled my day yesterday. Oh how I love them all! We spent the day at our dear friend Carolyn's farm. We have bought produce and eggs from her farm for almost 5 years now and want to see her succeed in every way. Yesterday we spent a good part of the day trying to be of help in various ways, potting up seedlings, fixing the greenhouse thermostat, harvesting sprouts and giving her moral support. She works from dawn till her head hits the pillow (way beyond dusk) and does it not because she loves hard work, but because it's what feeds her soul.

One of my dreams that I have nurtured and fed bit by bit over the past 10 years has been to live on land, growing food, raising chickens, connecting to the seasons and putting my roots deep down into the soil. Almost two years ago we put our little cabin in the woods up for sale as a way of moving closer towards that dream. But, then, well, the housing market, or divine forces, or whatever reason that we just don't know yet, has prevented our house from selling. So we sit up here in the beautiful pines and cedars, appreciating every ounce of it, but yearning for flatter land, open spaces, and no snow.

For now, we can help out Carolyn, feed our souls by lending a hand, connect on a deeper level with someone we like very much, give our son a chance to connect to where his food comes from, and spread the word about the benefits of eating seasonally, supporting local farms and growers, connecting to the land, and creating community ties.

Afterall, when a four year old who normally picks anything green or slightly "herby" looking from his food will eat a fresh sunflower sprout straight out of my hand and declare, "YUM," I know we're on to something good!

Please visit Carolyn at Butte Mountain Organic Farm!

http://buttemountainorganicfarm.com/

My Day Job

2009-04-27T10:55:00.000-07:00

I don’t often go into the details of my day job, but thought I'd share a little bit here.

I am a Project Coordinator for First 5 Amador. Each county in California has a First 5, which was formed to support children age 0-5 and their families in 1998. Our office is a small one and we each wear many hats. Mostly I oversee the fiscal side of things, but also help manage community grants, and when needed support other organizations and agencies by doing graphics work for flyers, brochures and outreach. My left and right brains get equal time!

This month the First 5 Northwest Region distributed a very comprehensive report on the positive impact those counties have had on children and their families. And although Amador County is in the Northeast region, the concerns and challenges are similar. I wanted to share with you all the great work that the Northwest counties are doing. Taking a preventative approach ~ good work for a good cause: children!

Here are the links to both the summary And the full report .

For more information about First 5 you can visit either of these links below:

http://www.first5amador.com/

http://www.f5ac.org/

Recreate Yourself as Your Very Own Super Hero!

2009-04-23T17:28:00.000-07:00

Okay, I got this link from the blog Jane's Medicine Tree. She in and of herself is amazing! Definitely a good read. But, here is the link I am referring to:

http://www.cpbintegrated.com/theherofactory

You can recreate yourself as your very own super hero, fun!

Here's me:

I love the name I ended up with: Splintery Condor!

So appropriate because I have many parts of myself which splinter off the core. And, I have a very deep affinity for the Turkey Vulture (a Condor of a sort).

Have fun discovering your inner super hero!

Indigo

Kundalini Belly Dance

2009-04-22T11:28:00.000-07:00

Clark's Corner Café Photos!

I meant to share these way back in March! I'm so honored to be part of Kundalini Belly Dance Tribe. I dance with some beautiful and talented sisters!!! Kimberly wasn't able to be there that night so she's not in the photos...we'll get some of her soon!
Enjoy!

http://www.kundalinidance.com/

Who Does She Think She Is?

2009-04-16T14:17:00.000-07:00

http://www.whodoesshethinksheis.net/

I learned about this documentary through someone I went to elementary school with...through Facebook of all places....his sister is involved in the film. It focuses on 5 female arists who are also mothers, and the challenge that presents, not only for them, but for women world wide. It is a challenge I feel also, how to balance the role of motherhood with the call for creative expression?

A screening of the film will be in San Francisco at the Red Vic Movie House, June 10 and 11.

Check out their website! Support the creative women in your life, encourage those who feel they can't, take time to honor those that are already doing so!

Decisive Moments

2009-04-16T09:46:00.000-07:00

“Living awakened, ultra-aware, purpose driven, choice filled lives...”

“…the difference between merely reacting to something, and actually being present and aware enough each and every moment to choose to have the ability to respond.”

These words are what it means to be a shaman according to the Animá path. One that I have embraced whole heartedly. A path that has brought much depth and self-exploration to my life. Yet a path that means I can’t sweep under the rug the parts of myself that I don’t like. A path that has been the most challenging ~ and rewarding ~ of my life so far.

I started my studies with Animá not quite a year ago. I found Animá through insightful articles by two remarkable women, Kiva and Loba in the journal Sage Woman. They introduced me to their home, the Sweet Medicine River Canyon and Animá, which led me to explore their website, which led me to the Shamanic Path course. I feel it was no accident that I happened upon Animá, many experiences had led me to it, it was time in my life to commit more fully to a shamanic path of study ~ and living.

These studies, and their application, have given me the gift of holding myself accountable for every action I take, each choice I make, how I define who I am, and for the very way I in which I pursue & define my purpose in life. Every moment in life is decisive, and can be a lesson as well, and I’ve chosen some to share that stand out in my life recently that have offered me the greatest insight and “aha” opportunities.

Making each moment decisive means being completely in the present. Worrying about the future, dwelling on the results of past decisions, these take me very far from the present. One part of a recent lesson was on “presence” and I created a list of ways to remember to remain present. Ha! That has been easier said than done! My list is filled with good intentions: I would “breathe” each morning before jumping out of bed; pause before I speak; walk slower; wear shoes that let me actually feel the earth or go barefoot or; and listen to others - really listen, not just wait for my turn to speak in a conversation. The reality? Having a four year-old means usually he comes in and wakes me up before the alarm and I jump up to tend to his needs, rather than asking him to wait while I breathe! Pausing before I speak, this has been fun! I still find myself responding immediately, but have been trying it out when I remember. Slowing down, walking slower, hmmm…when I don’t have a lot to do. Wearing shoes that let me feel the earth? Okay, twice I’ve done this? We won’t even talk about bare feet! Listening, really listening ~ this is actually going well, except when I get excited or find myself not heard, I tend to jump into conversations quicker, responding without thought. So, I have learned that intention is all good, but manifesting takes much more of a commitment. The greatest lesson though? Forgiving myself when I am not perfect.

A very different way of making sure each moment is decisive involves how I perceive myself and my interactions with others. For all of my childhood and much of my adult life I have been intimidated by strong-willed, outgoing, and bullying type personalities (to me they have all felt the same!). I could feel myself physically cringe in their presence, hoping to go unnoticed by either their passion or fury, depending on the moment and the person. I was easily knocked off center, and did much to avoid anyone that might fit that description. Yet I have also been good at hiding this part of myself. I would say most people who know me would not describe me as someone who is intimidated by others. I have come to realize however, that my fear of strong-willed people, actually stems from my own undeveloped sense of personal power. My strength or passion for life has gone unexpressed. I saw myself as powerless, rather than power-full. Learning this about myself means that each time I come across someone who intimidates me means physically grounding myself in the moment, staying centered, stepping back and really seeing who they are, not reacting to them, feeling strong, and not giving over my power to someone else. What a shift it has been. How much more comfortable I am in my own skin. And what a relief to be able to stay centered, and not take on others’ “stuff.” Yet sustaining this new found power-full-ness has been the greater challenge. Discovering it once and applying it, then expecting it to be there unconsciously each time thereafter has not been my reality. EACH time I find myself face to face with someone full of zest or magnetism or meanness means choosing to be centered. Choosing to be present. And choosing to be power-full.

Another decisive moment that I encountered recently weighed much heavier on my heart. A question in my last lesson called me to notice if something contributes or detracts from being present. Can I move toward that which contributes to being present, and move away from that which detracts? For myself I know that worrying about future results, when it's time to make a decision, detracts. Where feeling the present moment, really getting in touch with how a choice feels, contributes. Recently my son has been going through quite a rough spell, and I was faced with parts of myself that up until this point I had pushed down and away. He needed to go to the emergency room in the city, after a visit to the local hospital the day before had been less than successful, but it coincided with the first day of a new session of classes that I teach. I weighed in whether I needed to be there at the hospital or not. I knew he was in the best hands there are, his father is fabulous and nurturing and would be there for him. I felt torn between my creative outlet, my identity even, and my son. I also knew that I have the pattern of taking care of others before myself (and actually in this instance it would have meant letting down 25 or more women who were expecting a class that night). I realized that my fear was that they wouldn't come back, that they would see me as unreliable, and choose not to return. I was also experiencing a tremendous amount of guilt, for not making the "isn’t it obvious?" choice of putting my son first. In making this choice, what I was focusing on ended up taking me very far from the present moment. I had to let go of all of it—fear, guilt, self-judgment—not easy—and really feel at this decisive moment what was right for me. Not for my son, not for my students, but for me. I needed to be VERY present to make that choice. And it worked. I was completely at peace with the choice I made. So for me, worrying about others’ needs, worrying about the future…these take me very far from the present. Conversely, listening to my heart, my feelings…this keeps me present. This contributes to it.

I know there are many other instances that I could write about…but thank you for sharing in these bits and pieces put to paper (or keyboard) so far.

Thank you to Wolf, Kiva, Loba and Rhiannon for all that you have shared with me, all that I have learned from you. The journey is the blessing.

Warmest regards, Indigo.

Sacred Circles for Women

2009-04-16T09:37:00.000-07:00

To print this flyer click here, then scroll down to the bottom of that page and look for the tree, click again!

Signs of Spring

2009-03-10T16:03:00.000-07:00

Spring always seems to catch me by surprise. Suddenly trees are budding, flowers are blooming, grass is growing, our wood supply is dwindling down...it can’t be spring already? I think I'm surprised by it each year because I know how quickly it will be over.

In the Sierra Nevada foothills where I live, fall is short-lived, winter hurries by in a similar fashion, spring barely begins and then summer hits, too hot, too soon. And it's too hot, for too long - in my opinion of course. And the real reason, I must admit, to not being a fan of summer, is that not much rain, if any at all, falls from May to October. And with spring’s approach, that means fewer and fewer rainy days to look forward too. So I love and appreciate the rain each year, especially because I know it will be absent for a long stretch every summer.

Yet despite my protests, spring is definitely on its way! And it is always so beautiful when it arrives, so I really shouldn't complain.

What’s interesting during these transitions from one season to the next is that my home is about 2000 feet higher in elevation than where I work, and yet only 16 miles from one to the other! So though spring is just starting to emerge here at home, down the mountain the fruit orchards are covered in blossoms, the daffodils are nearly spent, the flowering quinces are a blaze of coral, and folks have already begun putting their vegetable seedlings into the ground. Where at my house, we might still have another snow storm come through, and the frost-free days won’t be here until May. So I get a bit of a tease, each time I head down that hill, a taste of spring, and yet also know that I can savor winter just a bit longer where I live, not rushing headlong towards summer quite yet. At least that’s how it feels.

This year we’ve had lots of rain, at least, much more than the past couple years, it’s still a little low for the year, but enough to gift us with the seasonal creek near our house. The sound of that gurgling brook makes my heart sing! How I’ve missed you! So this year the signs of spring are bigger and more lush than ever: the chickweed and miner’s lettuce are popping up everywhere: the daffodils are ready to burst; the robins are residing in the oaks once again; the slopes around my house are a soft velvety green; the poison oak’s little red tips remind us to pay attention to where we walk, doing its job to keep humans out while a piece of mother earth retreats and recovers; the pink manzanita flowers sway gently in the breeze like silent bells; the yarrow coats the ground in it’s soft fern-like embrace; and traces of snow,

cling to the shadowy corners, remind us that though spring is coming, winter is not quite done yet!

Enjoy the season!

The Bend in the River

2009-03-08T15:01:00.000-07:00

One of the many gifts of visiting the Sweet Medicine river canyon, in the southwestern part of New Mexico, home of the Animá Wilderness Sanctuary, is being given the opportunity to walk downstream, to the bend in the river. It is at this place, perhaps the very center and most sacred of an ancient people’s world, and quite certainly a place of intense and magnifying energy, where one may pause, reflect, and with purpose and intent, be silent, connected, engaged, alive, and still.

But to get to this place in the river, there is no path. And therein lies the magic, and power, of its gift.

I began my own journey downstream with gentle encouragement and the suggestion to take as long as I needed, to go with intent, and to quiet my mind. As I started out, there was still some semblance of a thin trail, and in front of me were footprints, both barefoot and sandaled, of others who had passed this way before me. Yet hidden under the soft river sand were scatterings of seed pods, potential for life renewed, but protected by prickly spines, sharp corners, and pokey thistles. In this high mountain desert, the need to survive scant rainfall and sometimes adverse conditions, calls for such protection. So off I went, barefoot ~ barely 24 hours after arrival from a place where shoes are taken for granted or used merely for fashion rather than function ~ stepping in places where others had preceded me, my feet, soft and vulnerable, tentatively crept forward one step at a time.

How easy it was, at first, to get lost in my thoughts, a noisy stream (of a very different kind) of consciousness that had nothing to do with this river or this canyon. Until, slowly, the path began to disappear, the footprints left by others were harder to find, or left by someone walking the quickened pace of sandaled feet. The stickers started to seem more prevalent, my pace slowed. Finding the place where someone had stepped before me, a clear patch of smooth sand, more often than not hid a sharp pod barely concealed, ready to embed into my foot, clinging to the hope of being transposed to a new place for germination. In my focused intent to already be downstream at the bend, I realized that I had not been paying attention to where I was currently at. I would take a step, feel no pain, and then hurriedly take the next one, presuming it to be safe as well, only to be jarred into the very present moment with pain shooting through my sole. Balancing precariously on one foot, picking the sticker from my tender flesh, piercing my fingertips in the process, trying not to fall onto that same foot onto another sticker, trying to regain my equilibrium, it felt as if I would never get there, to that bend.

And the lesson of that was not lost on me, not then and not now, that the journey itself was being forsaken for a place, a goal, the reward. I was struggling against myself, resisting the present moment, caught up in an unrealized future. How many times do we live our lives like this? Waiting for weekends and vacations, a better home, more money, less worries? Caught up in the chatter of hopes and dreams, and worries and anxieties, ignoring and denying pain and suffering, rushed and numb through a busy day, oblivious to the glorious sites, sounds and gifts of nature and the present? And so I kept on, feeling at times triumphant for focusing on placing each step carefully, with intent, only to quickly revert to wanting to be there, to the end, wondering if I’d ever get to that final spot.

I realized after a while that I could instead, as suggested, walk in the river itself, calf-high at this time of year, free of prickly pods and scratchy stickers. The moment I stepped onto that cool, smooth, velvety surface of wet river sand, my heart sang, my feet rejoiced and I literally thanked the earth, the soil, the mud, for soothing my sore and tired feet. This reprieve however was short lived, and existed in only small pockets near the edge of the river. In order to move on, and never once did I question moving on to that bend in the river, I had to walk across large pebbles, small stones, uneven surfaces and slippery rocks. I waved my arms around in the air with each step, trying to stay upright, keeping my balance, finding once again not a comfortable linear path, but a slowed pace, pain ~ and awareness ~ with each step, and the necessity of being ever so present.

And then finally, at some point, perhaps half-way, I stopped and looked up stream, and looked downstream, amazed and overwhelmed by the beauty and magnitude of this river canyon, in the far reaches of the southwest, where so few people live compared to where I come from, and wondered, how is it possible, that I have lived 40 years of my life, without ever having walked down the center of a river before, barefoot and alone? What a sheltered life I have led! What a moment of profound awakening. I savored that moment for quite a while, standing in the middle of that river, not at the place I was “supposed to go,” but fully engaged in the present, grateful, alert, relaxed, and in awe of what life can offer.

Eventually I continued on, step by step, with a new sense of appreciation for this venture. And then I had what can only be called a moment of unparalleled discovery, a shift in perspective so jarring and strong that it still leaves me reeling at its implications for all the other areas of my life. I realized that I had been trying to walk with my eyes and not my feet. Both amongst the thistles and in the river, I had been making the decision of where to put my foot for each new step based on what I saw, and not on what my foot felt. Once this dawned on me, this perhaps oh so obvious and very significant detail, the actual way in which I walked changed. I let my feet feel the bottom of the river, the rocks, the moss, the pebbles, and seek out the best possible placement for each step. Where before I had been suffering through pain in order to move forward, now I slowed down and felt each and every step, each moment, ensuring that it was beneficial for my foot. I began to experience the natural world in a way that it is perhaps best experienced ~ by feeling it! Alive and present, fully engaged, forgetting about “getting there,” instead living in the moment, sensing, touching, really connecting to a place, to a moment.

I realized during that walk, and later, at the bend in the river where I sat for a great long time, that so often I go about my days, making choices based not on feeling, or intuition even, but on surface level observations. Now, with this heightened clarity, I seek instead to make sure I know how I feel about something before making decisions, before acting, before moving forward. It doesn’t come naturally by any means, and takes great effort, with some stumbling along the way. But it is after all, the journey itself ~ of learning to be present, engaged, and fully alive, fully feeling and sensing our world ~ that offers us the best gift of all.

A Visit to a Very Special River Canyon

2009-03-04T21:11:00.000-08:00

We have just returned from a trip to the Gila Wilderness in southwest New Mexico. The place we visited is the Sweet Medicine river canyon ~ a wilderness sanctuary, ancient Mogollon site, and home to the Animá Center. It was a magical time, offering insights, quiet time, exploration and reflection for myself and my family. In future blogs I will be writing about my experiences in more detail, but for now, I wanted to share some photos.

On Being a Newbie

2009-02-22T20:53:00.000-08:00

I love learning. I have spent the greater portion of my adult life seeking out new experiences, knowledge, and places. Nothing feeds my soul greater than the chance to absorb new sites and smells, to delve into deeper ways of being and thinking, and to overcome personal challenges. I have learned Japanese, lived in Eastern Europe, taken up organic gardening, started a non-profit organization, built a straw bale chicken coop, opened a belly dance studio, and become a student of shamanism. Life is short and there is so much to do and see!

In stark contrast to this, I hate being a beginner at something. I am both a major control freak and a perfectionist. Being in a situation that is unfamiliar brings up both fear and frustration. Whether it’s learning to cross country ski or speak a foreign language, I want to be good at it NOW. I have no patience for myself on the learning curve. It goes without saying, there is no room for mistakes in attempting something new in my life. I am after all, my own worst critic.

Welcome to my crazy world!

Quite a few years ago, I became familiar with the concept “beginner’s mind.” It describes the state of mind that one experiences when learning something new, where freshness, excitement, and a sense of adventure prevail. However, this is one state I have yet to visit. When in a new place, I worry that I won’t know the customs and offend someone; when doing something that is physically challenging I swear like a sailor and get headaches easily; when I make mistakes I revert to childlike whining and blush uncontrollably; and the worst, when everyone in the room has more experience than me, I assume I am holding them back, preventing them from learning more!

This past week I put myself in that oh so familiar and exciting place once again, stepping out of my comfort zone, challenging myself with something new, and attempting to learn some new skills. I was the newbie. And it wasn’t going to be easy. I knew that it was time in my life to finally address my fears and frustration when in a new situation. I was determined to be relaxed, to be easy on myself, to have fun, and not worry that I would be in unfamiliar water.

The Challenge? I signed up, with a friend, for a 3-day belly dance intensive in San Francisco. There were over 20 woman in the class, learning from a woman renowned in the belly dance world for not only her teaching and dancing, but also for founding an entire new style of belly dance, American Tribal Style, that originated from her vast exposure to, and experience in, the many different styles of belly dance.

Now, please understand, I have over 10 years of belly dance experience, have been teaching for almost two years, lead and dance in a performance troupe, and as mentioned above, just opened a dance studio. But the class I was taking this past week was a style that, although I am somewhat familiar with it, is still fairly new to me. It is made up of improvisational moves from a shared vocabulary of dance moves that is both highly intuitive and also physically demanding. There is leading and following, different formations to learn, moves to master, and music theory to tackle. Some pieces to the puzzle are the same, but they are laid out in an entirely new way.

I hate to admit it, but the first two of the three days I had reverted back to my old “newbie” habits. I was shy, awkward, hovered in the back corners of the dance studio, and dreaded the moments where we had to move forward out into the center of the room and dance in front of the others. By the end of each day I felt overwhelmed and exhausted. And I felt not only miserable, but shocked and surprised at how “less than” I was feeling, and amazed at how I saw myself – as unworthy of ever learning this style.

What happened to the other me? The experienced dancer and teacher? The world traveler? The starter of organizations? The Shaman-in-Training no less? Is this how a shaman would act? What happened to my spiritual studies? My lessons on being present, on being the creator of my own reality rather than a victim to it, on healing and transformation? Where was that woman???

I awoke the third day and said, “Enough!” I was ready to start fresh. Ready to reclaim the “power-full” me. To feel good about myself. To be the dancer that I am. And also to be comfortable with being new at something. To relish in and actually enjoy beginners mind! To embody and live the lessons I have been learning, both as a dancer and as a student of shamanism.

And how did it go? Well, I think I actually did it!!! I had fun, I took less notes, I tried to be in the present moment, I laughed at myself, I stepped out of my angst enough to notice that others were learning and that they too made mistakes, I actually listened to the music and entered that place where dance, body, and space meld into a joyful state of no-time and ecstasy. Even if for just brief, ephemeral moments at a time. And this on top of having the “worse thing you can imagine happening” actually happen.

At one point I was out in the center of the room with two other dancers, 19 other students and the teacher watching, and all of the sudden the music came to an abrupt stop -- I had done something wrong, and was corrected in front of everyone! Ack! Now, had this happened on day one or two, in my “less than” state, I would have crawled into a tiny little whole and never come out. But on day three, with my new attitude, with my re-found self-assurance, with my openness to being NEW at something, I felt okay. I felt calm. It actually, believe it or not, felt good to learn to do something the way it should be done. And that it was okay that I didn’t know everything. I stood calmly in front of that room. I was not afraid. I was not embarrassed. Instead, I was calm. I was strong. I was in my center. There is nothing more empowering.

It was for me, clearly a breakthrough moment.
I am proud of it.
And humbled by it.
Life is truly a wondrous journey!
Thank you for sharing it with me.

For more information on American Tribal Style belly dance visit www.fcbd.com.

For more information on Shamanic Studies visit www.animacenter.org

25 Bits and Pieces

2009-02-08T11:14:00.000-08:00

I have a confession to make. My name is Tracy Carlton. And I'm addicted to Facebook.

If you don't know what Facebook is or have avoided it so far ~ run, resist, stay far away! Don't start!

One of the latest features making the rounds is folks sharing a list of 25 Things about themselves. I jumped in and spent way more time than any sane person should compiling my list. And I was spending SO MUCH time on it that I needed to save it for a later date to finish and post. But, horrors of all horrors, when I went back the next day, it was GONE!!!! All my creativity, my efforts, my self-expression ~ whoosh, sucked into cyberspace never to be seen again. Talk about a non-attachment moment. If only I were Buddhist.

But I'm not, so I started a new list. And put it here instead, in this blog, to share. Smarter and safer I thought. If I feel generous, I'll copy it over to Facebook, we'll see. Actually, it was a fun list to create, to think about all the parts of me and what to include, a chance to take stock, to reflect, to share parts of myself with I'm not sure who. A little bit of a risk, what if people think I'm a freak? Ah well, there ya go.

I've also enjoyed reading other people's lists, the lists are a way for insight into friends and family that we think we know, and who can surprise us with what they share. Or a first glimspe into someone we don't know well at all and would, as a result of reading their lists, like to get to know better. If you take the time to create your own list, I'd love to see it, please share and send it my way!

And let me know your thoughts on mine ~ enjoy!

1. If I had more money I’d have more tattoos (I have 3 currently, a teeny tiny one that hardly counts, the other two quite a bit more significant). Feeding my family, fortunately, does take precedence.

2. I teach tribal style belly dance classes, have my own studio, and am part of a performing dance troupe, and can’t believe that I get paid to do something I love! Shameless plug: http://www.kundalinidance.com/ (tribal belly dance: redefining belly dance!)

3. I’m SO ready to quit my day job and just do number 3. Working on it…

4. I used to speak Japanese and Czech, could still get by in a pinch, and still dream in both languages, mixed with a bit of high school Spanish (that’s all 3 mixed together in the same dream – talk about confusing).

5. I bake bread to relax.

6. Our very cute, affordable house is for sale and has been for way too long, someone please buy it. http://amador.fnismls.com/idx/idx.aspx?RMLS_SESSION_GUID=%7bfc003a35-4d83-436b-a6a2-6983d90695c8%7d&MLS=Amador&SUBSCRIBER=1dabe521-b5b1-4b9a-b445-f8b8db4fc326&

7. I have been and will always be a cat person. I have only 3 at the moment because our house is small (that’s “cozy,” if you’re interested in buying it).

8. My husband and I built a straw bale chicken coop while I was pregnant. Smart? Hmmmmm……. It’s gone by the way, clearly didn’t add value to the home when putting it on the market.

9. I don’t own a TV (that probably explains #8).

10. I tried dreadlocks for all of 6 months. It was very brave, but not very me. My boss never said a thing, but I could tell she was VERY relieved when they were gone (I actually combed out each one, one by one, instead of cutting them off as some people would have done ~ yep, hurt like heck).

11. My favorite place to ever visit was northern Thailand, and I wish I would have stayed longer instead of “keeping to my plan” which meant moving on to the next place too soon. Lesson learned.

12. I’m pretty far out of the box in most areas of my life. You name it, I’ll probably question it.

13. The coolest thing ever to see in person is a giraffe running, preferably – most definitely - not in a zoo.

14. Dark Chocolate. The only thing that defies the concept of “moderation in all things.”

15. I have a very balanced right and left brain: I sew, paint and dance, but I can balance a mean checkbook. This has come in handy many times throughout my life.

16. As I’ve gotten older my spiritual path has become central to who I am. Yet it’s been the one thing I’ve been reluctant to share with others. I’ve kept it very private. But that’s changing.

17. Hands down the grooviest thing I got out of getting an MA in Social and Cultural Anthropology was learning that in many other places and times in history, a woman’s Moon Time (affectionately known here as one’s period, the curse, that time of the month, etc) is when a woman is at her most powerful and intuitive. Women on the same cycle come together during this time and do NOTHING, but be together and connect to each other and their god/goddess/higher power. This is definitely a ritual that needs to be made more popular and mainstreamed here in the U.S. (people, we NEED those days off from work, laundry, child care, groceries, bill paying, etc., we’ve earned it!).

18. My son was in intensive care for the first three months of his life, and I hope that it was the greatest challenge I will ever have to face in this lifetime.

19. I believe every single person is here to do something creative and unique to themselves, all they need is encouragement and support. Something our society withholds and/or places roadblocks to at just about every chance. So what’s your dream?

20. So even though I am all about eating healthy, whole foods, local, organic and sustainable agriculture, the slow food movement, and the connection between our relationship to food and our relationship the Earth, I still crave, and give into, Pop Tarts every once in a while.

21. I’m a Shaman-in-training (see #16).

22. I believe in miracles. And magic.

23. My son is my greatest teacher. May he please grow up to forgive the many stumbles and mistakes I make in negotiating this amazing path called motherhood.

24. I thought I’d be single forever. I can’t believe how lucky I am. My husband really is my best friend and knows me like no one else and supports all of the wacky things I do (see the many things on this list, for example). And to think we met online! He was SO worth the wait! I love you Dave!

25. I am grateful for the beauty and abundance of my life and for all of the people that are in it.

On Being Present and Aware

2009-01-20T15:24:00.000-08:00

Last year I embarked on a new course of studies, or I should say, the studies found me, as they were a natural continuation of a path I had started many years before. I am a student at a remarkable place called Animá, participating in their Shamanic Path course. I'll explain more in another blog, reflecting on what a tremendous impact this has had on my life, but for now, want to share a recent lesson I've been working on and my efforts in trying to apply it to my life.

My current lesson is one on Presence. My teacher and guide explains it very eloquently, "Connection to self and place, and thus everything else we ever are or do, is enhanced by our degree of presence. It is both the 'here' and the 'now' in the expression 'be here now.' The shamanic expansion of identity, consciousness and awareness, as well as explorations of the boundless and timeless, are rooted in and empowered by our ability to intensely, wholly inhabit our current physical/ecological/spacial/social/emotional context... to intensely inhabit the current unfolding moment."

Yet there are many distractions in this world to keep one from being present. There are the obvious things like television and billboards, focusing on the weather not of the moment but of that in a few days, and the internet, like this blog, which keeps us glued to screens rather than to our immediate surroundings. But there are other hazards that keep us from being in the present as well, nostalgic memories of days past, worries about the unknown future, and speculation on events yet to happen.

The task of becoming ever present, ever aware of our surroundings can be an awakening to what is right in front of us, but to that which we've never seen or acknowledged before. It can be an emotional insight, a gift of discovering a part of selves that needs healing and love, or it can simply be noticing some physical detail, some object that we never knew was there, like a raccoon living under your house. In my studies and activities on being present, I have experienced both kinds, the tangible and the intangible. Today, I had one such reminder of the physical kind. And the real lesson was that it was not from my own awakening height of awareness, but from my son who is 4. As we all know, nothing like children to keep you in the present!

This one happend at the local market near our house. We don’t visit this market often, even though it is only 5 minutes away, because it is further up the hill past our house, usually we get items we need when we are “down” the hill in town in the other direction. But I went there today with my son on a quick errand. As we reached the back of the store he stopped and asked if I could pick him up so he could touch something up on the wall. I looked directly up above me to see a VERY large moose head attached to the wall. Oh my! I jumped in surprise. I had NO idea it was there! Even though I don’t visit this store often, how many times had I walked to the back and NEVER noticed not one, but TWO giant moose head trophies on the wall! This is especially amazing since I’m not one to support trophy hunting ~ so these types of things normally stand out for me. My, oh my. Being present indeed!

So it was a humorous gift from the universe to me, a present if you will, of not becoming too sure of myself on this path I've chosen. It was a humble reminder that there is always room to learn more, to grow further, and see deeper. And that the best lessons are not grand experiences outside of daily life, but right at hand, next to me in the produce aisle, standing only 40" tall, asking me simply to look up and notice what is right in front of me.

Anima

2009-01-16T16:45:00.000-08:00

I would like to share with you a very special place.

Animá.

An enchanted learning center in the Gila Wilderness in New Mexico.

I am both a student and apprenctice applicant there ~

challenging, growing, stretching, and becoming my true self in ways

unlike anything I've ever studied before.

Please take some time and discover and explore the many offerings of this magical place. And let me know what you think.

Announcing the new Medicine Woman Tradition and Animá websites:

The Medicine Woman Tradition & Correspondence Courses.

http://www.medicinewomantradition.org/A home for all herbalists, healers and students of the living earth, featuring medicinal herb profiles, the inspiring writings of Kiva Rose, descriptions of the Medicine Woman Core and Herbal courses, and the magical Medicine Woman Gathering held each Summer in the forested mountains of New Mexico...and...

Animá Correspondence Courses& Wilderness Learning & Retreat Center. http://www.animacenter.org/

Offering empowering Shaman Path, Rewilding, Medicine Woman

and Path of Heart online courses, and a free articles archive... as well as wilderness retreats, vision quests and workshops at the Animá Sanctuary, a wild river canyon and ancient

place of power in the enchanted Southwest.

2009 Workshops:

ReWilding: Thriving in Hard Times as Good, May 22-25

Shaman Path Intensive, July 2-5

The Medicine Woman Gathering, Aug 7-12

Wild Foods Weekend, Aug 28-31

Animá is the way of vital, authentic, purposeful being... of heightened

awareness, radical honesty, connective sentience, self knowledge and self love,

purpose and conscious action, bliss and balance, health and wholeness.

Correspondence Courses drawn directly from the source,

from the living earth and this enlivened universe, and through our intuitive

hearts... manifest in our commitments and acts,

on our unique individual paths.

The Animá Medicine Woman tradition focuses in addition on the

committed healing of self, others, and the world we are a part of.

Please consider a supportive Membership.

And thank you so very much for your interest and alliance,

helping spread the word about this special place and service.

We are only able to give because of you.

Too Much?

2008-12-31T22:42:00.001-08:00

Is it “too much” if you love it all?

I have many interests and passions. And I pursue them all. And I often find myself overwhelmed by the many pots I have my fingers in. I am married and a mother of a young child; I teach belly dance classes with a brand new studio space opening next week; I lead a belly dance troupe that rehearses regularly and performs monthly; I am a student of shamanic studies in a distance learning program called Anima; I am also an applicant to become an apprentice of this same place; I love to sew; I keep a journal; I draw and paint; I bake my own bread; I love to garden and raise my own food; I take workshops to become a better belly dancer and teacher; I love to travel (though haven’t done much of that recently); I cook to relax; I savor and cherish my alone time; I am a tree hugging-dirt worshipper who must spend time outside each day; and I have a “real” job that is for a good cause that is not quite full time, more than part-time, to help pay for it all (though it is of course more “in my way” of doing all of the above if I were to tell the truth – and I try to make it a point of telling the truth).

Whew. Oh, and I try to sleep every once in a while too.

So what’s a girl to do?

I could make clever and highly unrealistic new years’ resolutions about doing less, but aside from the job for a good cause (mainly because it requires working on some else’s schedule rather than my own), I wouldn’t eliminate anything that I do.

What I do instead, is try to slow down. I don’t try to do it all each day. I am not always successful at this mind you. For example today, on my lunch hour, I drove to 6 different places to accomplish twice as many things that were on my list and still didn’t get them all done ~ okay, perfect example of how not to slow down! But even in my madness to do it all, I realize that most of what I choose to accomplish in a day is set up and determined by me. I take care of myself first. And there are not many role models for this. Especially for women. But it makes the world of difference in my attitude, in how I feel about each of the moments that make up my life. I am the creator of my life. I can determine how busy I will be. There is freedom and power in choosing how to spend each moment of my life, savoring each moment because it is filled doing something I love.

But wait you say, what about family obligations? Paying bills? Cleaning the bathroom? Who does all of those tedious tasks that weren’t mentioned above? I still have those in my life. But even those things, I have learned to make more interesting and enjoyable. One, by choosing when and where and how to do them. For example, spending time with my family for the holidays ~ family time can be onerous of course ~ so I suggested we go away somewhere fun instead of doing the same old thing, and we ended up at the coast and in lieu of gifts spent our money on a beach house and good food, with many walks and a fabulous show of winter storms over the ocean to enjoy instead. Another example, when I pay bills I do it the old fashioned way (no automatic computer payments for me), I sit down with my checkbook, a beautiful pen, outside on my deck, with incense lit, a glass of wine, and music playing. It’s a ritual rather than a duty.

And, yes, I still get overwhelmed. But what I have found that really works best, is staying present. Being fully engaged in each act, each chore, each errand that I’m doing at that moment. Rather than thinking about the next four things on my list (and trust me, I am a list queen!), if I can focus instead on the one right in front of me, I am able to enjoy it, do it right, and savor it, and know that I don’t have to worry about what comes next, it will get its own turn at being the center of my attention. And, the greatest reward of all, in staying present, is that I am often shown some small detail, given a precious insight, or led on a new path of discovery that would have been a blur, if noticed at all, had I been looking ahead to the next thing. Today, in my mad lunch rush, I was waiting at a red light, and found myself thinking about my next stop (the post office if you must know, wondering if they would have anything besides flag stamps), when I reeled myself back in, looked out the passenger window, and saw a hawk land on a branch in a tree right at eye level! What a beautiful gift! So though staying present takes conscious effort, it is so worth it!

Finally, did I mention that I don’t have a TV? (Here comes the preachy part!) I choose to be fully engaged in MY life, not some actor’s, or worse these days, someone else’s life on a reality show. No! Take your TV to your nearest recycling center. Don’t even donate it, just get rid of it! Get outside, find some art supplies, turn on some good music, cook a good meal, heck, buy a drum! Do something that you have always been afraid to do! Go for it!!! Time to create our lives, fill them with the passion and creativity. Get busy, but please, be busy doing what you love!! (End of preachy part.)

I haven’t really solved the dilemma of having too many things that fill my time, but at least I am content in knowing that I love my life, each and every crazy, busy, blessed moment of it!

Winter Solstice and the Gift of Eagle

2008-12-21T00:48:00.000-08:00

The longest night of the year, and I cannot sleep. Rather than tossing and turning in bed hoping for slumber, I am instead fully awake, fully experiencing this night.

Winter Solstice, the turning of the wheel of the year, the returning of the light. When the days once again lengthen and the sun returns. Darkness gives way to light. Endings. And beginnings. Death. And rebirth.

The shortened days and longer nights this time of year lend themselves quite easily, if we allow, for sorting through our shadows, the darkness that is part of us all ~ each in our own unique and individual ways. It can be ugly, it can be painful, it can be downright depressing to own up to that which may hurt others or harm ourselves. But at the same time, by looking squarely at our darkness, we can see that which needs transformed, left behind, or embraced to better serve who we are meant to be. Our darkness can be our greatest gift.

I have danced in and out, unaware then deeply involved, distracted then fully engaged in celebrating and honoring the celestial holidays such as Solstice. Yet it has been a day (or night) to give pause simply because countless other cultures throughout time have noted its worthiness. In past years I have created rituals, lit candles, and given thanks, but I don’t think I ever truly connected from my heart with what this time of year represents. This year feels different.

This year I actually feel a darkness lifting, I feel my inner light glowing, I feel the beginning of the stirrings of actually feeling free! No, I’m not quite there yet, but I feel the warmth of a glowing ember!

My gift this year, the darkness that I am embracing, has been my own sense of power. Or lack there of. By power, I mean not power over, but the power that comes from within. Empowerment. Being power-full. For much of my life I have given my power to others. I have given away my very center. I have expected others to fulfill needs that in no way was ever theirs to tend to. I have lived through others hoping that through proximity, I would become like them. I would become frustrated because I needed others more than they needed me. I did not see that my own center was shifted outside, away from myself onto others. This year, especially this season, has been a time to face this imbalance squarely and see what I have been doing. It is time to reclaim all that I want to be. All that I am meant to be. I am done looking to others hoping that their light will illuminate me. It is time to light the inner flame that is in the center of ME.

While I was facing this shadow side of myself, during these very short days with much darkness, I was also given a gift. Recently I have been focusing more on being present. On being aware. And I was delighted to see that this exercise has its rewards! Not once, but four separate time in 24 hours I was greeted by Eagle. Alas, not the flesh and alive winged one itself, but in images, stories, artwork, and lessons. The first time Eagle showed up I didn’t take much notice, but by the fourth time I was on high alert.

The Eagle is a symbol for many, many cultures. Representing strength, freedom, and yes, power. But I have learned more about this fascinating bird, it has also been a symbol throughout time for spirit, creation, healing, and illumination.

And so Eagle appeared, during the darkest time of the year, to remind me of my own spirit, of my own creative abilities, that by reclaiming my power I am healing myself, and that ~ with the return of the light of this Solstice ~ illumination awaits!

Blessings to all this Winter Solstice! And many thanks to Eagle.

This Eagle, and many others, can be found at www.firstpeople.us.

Snow

2008-12-18T14:38:00.000-08:00

I thought I had a love hate relationship with snow. It’s so beautiful. The silence and quietness that envelopes you completely. Building snowmen and making snow angels. Snow-shoeing and sled rides. But it’s also shoveling our driveway, and if deep enough, the entire gravel road we live on just to get to a plowed, paved road. And then there’s the icy roads, with not enough snow and ice each year to remember from the year before how to actually drive in the darn stuff. And the fact that most of the people in the county live over 1000 feet lower down the mountain than us, and are being rained on, and not understanding why we’re stuck, while the snow at our house is building up inch by dreadful inch.

We have been ready to leave the snow for over a year. Our house is on the market. (Need I mention what kind of market we’re in?) We want to live lower, out of the forest, have warmer winters, a longer growing season, have a vegetable garden and an orchard for fruit trees. We are done shoveling, done digging, done risking our lives on curvy icy mountain roads.

Yet something this year revealed itself to me. It’s not the snow that I am fighting against. It’s the schedules. It’s the appointments. It’s society’s insistence that we go on with a 9-5 routine, 5 days a week, every week of the year. There is no allowance for snow. For weather, for goodness sake! You must still go to school, be to work on time work, attend your meetings. It’s the rigidity of the work-driven county I live in that I’m pushing up against. It’s the clock. It’s the calendar. It’s the regimented life that so many insist we follow.

And I want it to stop! I do not want to fight my way down the mountain, I want to take a walk in the snow and enjoy the stillness. I want to curl up with a book and a cup of tea in front of the wood stove and not worry about going anywhere. I want to flow with nature’s rhythms ~ the shortened days, hunkering down, the season for going within. I want to appreciate the here and now. I want to savor the present.

I am ready for a change in priorities. Working hard, making money (or scraping by), focusing on the elusive future ~ weekends, vacations, retirement ~ we have missed so much with this narrow vision of what life can be. Adhering to schedules, timelines, calendars, all that have nothing to do with the season of the year or the length of a day. The snow is here to remind us to slow down, to go within. It is not a time of sowing or harvesting. It is the time of year to pause, to reflect, to dream, and to simply be. The time of year that reminds me to quiet my very busy mind, the chatter, the constantly doing, the lists. Having a road covered in snow gently forces me to take care of immediate needs, the present ~ enough wood for the stove? enough food? And to reflect on all that the previous year has brought, and what I’d like the next year to bring. But without having to act on any of it!

I’m ready for our society to shift its focus from constantly doing more, being busy, working so hard to have the many gadgets and appliances and the stuff that merely distracts us from the present. Instead I want us all to shift to connecting, to creating, and to simply being.

So it turns out I don’t hate snow at all. I actually love this time of year and I love the snow.